Review of Zookeeper (2011) by Tim E — 09 Aug 2012

The Zookeeper. A charmless mess, with one single shameful laugh on my behalf, so this couldn't get lower, and also having a lion with Stallone's voice I just found amusing. Apart from that this is a witless, badly made mess. A missed opportunity, and a family film for nobody. With animal characters for kids, who talk in pop culture references that kids understand, and then the main story being based around a romance, and how they are trying to set up the Kevin James character, but this won't interest children because they're not interested in that yet, and we just think it's stupid. This brings me onto one of the biggest point, all the characters are either plain stupid, or just annoying. I'm sorry to say that I found all the animals, except from the gorilla and the lion, to be extremely annoying. This is due to the script, which is awful, but also some of the voices just 'Jar Jar Binks-ed' me up.

The performances are exceedingly average in this movie with Kevin James trying to put as much energy into it, but when you're working with a script this bad then it can't be saved. Also, another problem I had with this movie is that this is a family film, but they have some light swears that just seem a bit odd coming from the animals and such, when this is supposed to be for older animals, I have never understood why you would put swears like crap etc into these kinds of movies. it never works. The only character that I actually did like Was James' love interest who I thought was a likable enough character. Everyone was an exaggeration most of the time, so there isn't much to judge. Also, whoever Robin is in this movie. she was just awful. Then the voice acting, which I found to be mixed. Here it is: Sylvester Stallone and his Lioness wife thing, they were probably the funniest part of the whole movie, with there bickering etc, then Nick Noulte was good as well. Then there was Adam Sandler as annoying as he could be as the monkey, who just got on my nerves, as the voice didn't suit the monkey at all- also Maya Rudolph, who I really like, just annoyed me in this movie, but that was partially due to the script, and the stupid singing she did. Then the elephant who I didn't know voiced him, but he just got under my skin, and drove me insane. I just wanted to slap him. But it is a family film, so a mild push is all that is needed.

Then there is the script. Whoever let this script by should be shot, Not really but still. This script is awful, and completely patronizes the audience by trying to keep hip and cool, and then will just add so much rubbish into the script, that it got unbearable at times. I can see how some children could enjoy this film for the animals, but they aren't thee main part of the movie. The main part is about how Kevin James wants to be with this woman, and how he makes her jealous by being with another woman. It is just bad. And is also stupid, as it is never believable, as no-one would ever take an animal's opinion on how to get a girl. For example, in this movie, he takes advice from a wolf about weeing to show that they have power, and the scent will attract a woman, so he goes and releases his bowels in the middle of the restaurant. If you think this is amusing. Feel free to watch this movie. I will not.

The direction is nothing really. There isn't much to say about it, because this movie is so awful that there isn't really much to say about it. All I can say that there were some oddly edited scenes in this movie, with Kevin James first meeting the lion when he talks, and then there is a lot of quick cut shots of him screaming and such, and it is so awkward, and slightly disturbing, but happens way too quick, and then it is over. And you are just left going 'What?!'.

But remember this, after all the many problems, and the awfulness. This movie is harmless. it is a family film, and as long as there isn't a franchise that follows then this won't kill you, and there is one laugh to be had here. Added to this, it is fun to see Stallone and Noulte as animals. But apart from that there isn't much fun to be had here. Not a must-see. But if you want to get your kids to be quiet, then try this movie, but there is a possibility that they'll get bored. Just put Toy Story 3 back on again. Always work.