Review of Zombie Strippers! (2008) by Justin B — 03 Jan 2009

Yes. Five stars. I gave this movie five stars. And I do it again. I dont care if my entire neighborhood lynch-mobs me, I'll always give this movie five stars.

You've heard of South Park right? Well a few fans of that show may remember a certain returning character known as "Towlie". Towlie, to put it simply, is a talking towel who likes to get high. And everyone loves him. Why? Because he makes no sense. And the creators openly admit him as being "The worst character ever".

Now "Zombie Strippers" is the Towlie equivelent of zombie movies. Because like Towlie, It is completely, efoortlessly shameless, but thats what makes it a wonderful thing.

This looks to be the only existing case in cinema history (that I am aware of) where completely giving up on a movies credibility, has made it so much better than all it's peers. "Day of the Dead"? "Plane Dead"? They were cool in a dumb way but were just completely shit when you got down to it. In fact, any zombie movie with the exception of 2004's "Dawn of the Dead" and any classic works of Romero has been gory, and kinda fun, but just lame.

Enter "Zombie Strippers". It really is an R18+ posing as an MA15+. Sure to be a cult hit amongst horror fans, it is loaded with fake boobs, sparkly g-strings, full frontal female nudity, brutally sadistic gore, and sinks to such incredible lows that you will not f*cking beleive it. Having said that, the zombie effects on the girls all look awesome, easily outdoing any other zombie movie you care to think of.

Yes. "Zombie Strippers" is completely and utterly retarded. But rather than question why it exists, just enjoy it for what it is. Look boobs! Strippers! And now theres zombies! Gore! Boobs! Gore! Dancing corpse babes! Jenna Jameson! Robert Englund! If your honestly going to critique a movie called "Zombie Strippers" then you know not a damn thing about cinema. Or fun for that matter.

Justins Best Bit: Er.....everything. But the scene with the billiard balls, oh my freaking lord.........