Review of Without a Paddle: Nature's Calling (2009) by Alan G — 10 Apr 2009

Without a Paddle: Nature's Calling has nothing at all to do with the first movie. This movie revolves around a guy who meets a vegetarian animal-rights crusader while on the first day of high school, she gets expelled the second day before she can so his 'cool' homemade 'Meat is Murder' T-shirt.

Anyways his little friend, who works in a nursing home, accepts the dying wish of an ancient old lady to find her grand-daughter, whom winds up being, little Mizz Feminist crusader. So he, his friend, and a snotty English guy with ulterior motives travel to her last known whereabouts deep in the rain-forests.

This movie was atrocious, the joke aren't just easily telegraphed, they're also massively unfunny, the acting is sub-standard and I didn't give a toss about any of the characters involved in the least.

Also Jerry Rice was a great football player, and as an actor he was a great football player. That was seriously painful to watch.