Review of Wendigo (2002) by Izzie B — 22 Aug 2008

Synopsis: Rednecks, city folk, and a guy in a deer fursuit running in front of trucks and yelling "boo". Enough said.

After I finished this movie I wandered around the house ranting and raving for five minutes straight, this movie sucked that bad.

The Wendigo is an existing creature in Native American myth, and my favorite mythological creature. It once starts as a man, but if it eats enough human flesh, it mutates into the Wendigo, a beast with a ravenous appetite. And it only eats, you guessed it, people.

Now how, pray tell, can you take such an inherently cool monster and turn it into an artsy clusterfuck of fail? Cannibals have so much movie potential, yet all we get is the cinematic equivalent of a cat launcher. Cool in theory, but has to be masterfully executed to be effective.

Wendigo lacked all these qualities.

It's a damn shame. I really thought you could not go wrong with a cannibalistic spirit. Learn something new every day.

Time of Death: 0. There was only death in the last ten minutes.

Blood and Gore: 0. There was meager splatter and deer carving.

Nudity: Yes.

Plot: There was a plot?

Dialogue Cheesiness: 7. It was less dialogue and more screaming "GOD DAMNIT.".

Characters: Rednecks and city folk and deer people, oh my!

Afterthoughts: I had high hopes for Wendigo. And it all came crashing down. As I stated earlier, I thought you could not go wrong with a cannibal. How fucking difficult is it to integrate that into a plot? Apparently it takes a rocket scientist.

Don't see it. And if you do, tell me where you live so I can come to your house and punch you in the ovaries.