Review of Welcome to the Jungle (2007) by Craig S — 04 Apr 2008

Directed by: Jonathan Hensleigh.

Starring: Sandy Gardiner, Callard Harris, Nick Richey, Veronica Sywak.

<<"People go missing every day...but not the son of the Vice President of the United States...and not in Cannibal territory. In 1961, the disappearance of Michael Rockefeller led to the largest manhunt in U.S history.">>.

The story follows two young couples who head into the New Guinea wilderness in an effort to find Michael Rockefeller, the heir to the Rockefeller fortune who disappeared in 1961.

I had set my expectations pretty low...but man did I not expect it to be this bad. The DVD cover was beaming with reviews, stating it was 'Quite possibly the most terrifying film of the last decade'...this film is anything but.

It all starts at the first frame. Not only throughout the film is it technically flawed (we are meant to get the effect of hand held style on a handicam, yet each person has professional steadicam experience and the cameras quality is top notch...and how many times was there a 5th person holding the camera when there was meant to be 4?), we are introduced to 4 of the most immature, inhuman characters you will ever see grace the screen for many years to come. Alongside some atrocious and unrealistic dialogue, the actors deliver so horribly that I could never even believe that they were trying to act normal. From there the film runs at a mere 80 minutes, yet for 60 of them, we are slowly dragged through there journey towards there destination and we encounter more of there dull personalities and even some unbelievable over the top moments when the characters fight...and what was up with the missionaries and the characters horrible attitude towards them?

By the time we have endured that hour, we couldn't care less about anything that is going on and even when you get a damn decent shot or two of the gore, I never felt my excitement rise above nothing. Another horrible film to hold great reviews all over its cover, Welcome To The Jungle is unbelievably bare and dull on every single level.