Review of War Dogs (2016) by Jake B — 28 Aug 2016

A strong performance from Jonah Hill is the foundation around which War Dogs lays, limp and disorientated. The film's advertisements drove home the fact that Todd Phillips directed the highly lucrative Hangover series, with smash cuts of the suit-clad duo of Teller and Hill carrying bags of money and fist-bumping, before ultimately revealing that the buddy-comedy facade wasn't securely attached.

Trying to combine a tense thriller in the contemporary bureaucratic climate with a drug-addled double act whose antics would be more at home in a 'Pineapple Express' sequel leaves a lot to be desired. The numerous confrontations between Teller's character and De Armas' are pitched to be tense and unnerving but consistently fall flat as they toggle their relationship from 'regretful separation' to 'warmly welcome togetherness'. Teller's character is so flat, so emotionally numb, that any threat he is put under serves only to excite at the possibility of a major shift in the plot. Teller's narration only serves to show how flat his character is, a descriptive voice in the ether, while Jonah Hill wades through each scene, his radiant tan and stocky build drawing eyes towards him, with a comparatively stunning performance of a volatile businessman. Comparatively. The 'humour' that scatters itself through the film like buckshot comes from Jonah Hill's nasal laugh that is offered seconds of screen time in every instance it was used, as if it were irrefutable comedy genius.

(As a side note, I frequently found myself thinking that you could edit scenes from The Wolf of Wall Street together with parts of War Dogs and the films would meld together into one long nightmare sequence of Jonah Hill sniffing cocaine or macro shots of burning cigarettes.).

The film had two clear paths to take, either a bumbling comedy of two stoners accidentally having to become jackals and offending arabs, somali pirates, the Pentagon and everyone inbetween, or a 'Zero Dark Thirty' style story about the brutal free-market cutthroat pressure of the arms trade. Instead Phillips took a long look at the options and went for a film about two twenty-something drug abusers who are thoroughly abused by the system in spite of the film never attempting to show the characters being cheated or wronged, in which they get their big shot by risking it all, and instead of doing the rational thing and using their stable footing to sell mid-range orders, decide to subsidize an international war while also still ingesting cocaine and quoting Scarface, bullying people off their contracts and maximising profits because it simply makes sense to want more money. The film's tepid second act is graced by Henry Girard (Bradley Cooper), a big name in the arms trade who raises concerns about the nature of the business for Packouz (Teller), while sparking an even greater desire to go all-in to secure the profits within Diveroli (Hill), before hashing out a muted resolution that aimed to adhere to the source material the expense of a meaningful ending. In short, people are left without any substantial heft to their punishments for their wrongdoings.

Phillips had a plethora of targets to strike at with scathing criticism, from toxic frat boy bro culture to the fact that the USA arms its bravest and best with weapons from the lowest bidder, and instead played it safe and gave the inconceivably fortunate duo a slap on the wrist and goes "Naughty little scamps. So, how about that war then huh?".

Like one of the 7.62x39mm rounds the film finds itself based around, the question is not about whether this film hit a pertinent target, but rather if it ever left the chamber.