Review of Van Helsing (2004) by Korey L — 06 May 2012

Honestly, I'm not sure where to begin with Van Helsing. Director Stephen Sommers has a good premise, but his thrusters are set to CGI overload, and the whole film suffers as a result. There isn't a frame of Van Helsing that doesn't seem artificial, and it doesn't help that most of the visual effects look quite silly.

Hugh Jackman and Kate Beckinsale are on autopilot-usually they seem unsure what they're reacting to. And the villains-Richard Roxburgh, Elena Anaya, and Kevin J. O'Connor-seem like they came from a James Bond parody or a bad Bullwinkle cartoon.

Sure, Van Helsing starts off with a bang, but it's a steep downhill slide from there, peppered with cheesy one-liners, shitty visual effects, a boring script that seems VERY confused about who the hell Van Helsing actually is, routine action scenes, and a Dracula who seems more like Liberace on steroids.

By the time we reach the Castle Dracula finale, the movie is out of gas, resorting to silly plot devices and the most soulless CGI monstrosity battle this side of a Michael Bay film. In my youth, I remember enjoying Van Helsing, but now? Stupid popcorn entertainment, with less emphasis on the entertainment and more emphasis on the stupid.