Review of Urban Legends: Bloody Mary (2005) by Bryan G — 30 Jul 2005

[font=Courier New]This is one of those direct to video sequels that generates? for some reason or another? an interest in seeing it for me. I mildly liked the first in the series, and was somewhat fond of the second. Both, although seriously flawed, contained some of my favorite urban legend stories.

[i]Urban Legends: Bloody Mary[/i] contains some of my favorites as well, but none of them really transfer well into live action. In the end, it seemed almost like they were scarping the bottom of the horror barrel for stories to get this movie to feature length.

And the filmmakers seemed to want to fit as many stories as they could in this movie. Once person?s death spans three different urban legends stories. One, the one about the person hearing a dripping sound somewhere in the house, happens to be my favorite. After seeing it on film, I really wish it would have just stayed a story.

The movie starts of with what I guess are supposed to be the nerdy outcast girls, although none of them seem likely to fall into this category if they were in the real world. They are dressed basically in their underwear telling stories and having pillow fights. Soon one says what the DVD box describes as an ?ancient incantation? and unleashes evil about their little town.

The ancient incantation is of course saying ?Bloody Mary? three times. I know that story is old, but is it really an incantation? Wouldn?t you have to say it over lighted candles with the blood of a virgin splattered on you in order for it to be considered an incantation?

Anyway, people who have played an awful prank on the three girls for publishing a story in the school newspaper begin to die. How do they die? Well by Urban Legends of coarse! And then the movie takes a Scooby Doo like journey to discover the source of this evil that is taking lives.

I wish the deaths had been a little more intense then they are. I thought with the tanning bed death, it would be uncomfortable to watch. But it is over so soon, that you feel cheated. And the spider eggs in the face death is so bad looking? and horribly acted? that you wish the movie would end there already.

Is that the worst? I wish! There are so many stale characters in this movie, you almost don?t care who is going to die. Even the heroes of the movie begin to grate your nerves, and you wish they would die. And how the hell thought it would be a good idea to have the only black woman in the movie garner the worst looking afro wig ever on screen!

I guess since Loretta Devine wasn?t going to do this movie, the studio thought it would be good to have a tribute character to [i]Foxy Brown[/i]. Foxy Brown, played by Pam Grier in the 70?s, was Devine?s character in the original [i]Urban Legends[/i] hereon.

And then there is the evil spirit. I?m really getting tired of the evil ghost girl seeking revenge on people who had nothing to do with her demise. It was alright in [i]The Ring[/i] and [i]The Grudge[/i]. But with so many movies doing this now, I?m starting to lose my fear of ghost children. And why the hell does the one in this movie look like [i]The Ring[/i] girl somehow mated with Linda Blair in [i]The Exorcist[/i]?

I guess I should have expected this sort of junk from a direct to video sequel. Hopefully either studios stop making crap like this, or I start to wise up and stop renting it. I wouldn?t recommend this movie to anyone? not even die hard fans of the original two. This is nothing short of a complete waste of time. [/font].