Review of Uncle David (2010) by Sausages M — 28 Dec 2011

Hilarious. I'm literally the first person to show any interest in this film on here. Well, let me start by saying I live on the island this film is set, Sheppey in Kent, and that I've seldom seen what I consider its bleak beauty so brilliantly visually portrayed. Unfortunately, that's where any beauty ends where "Uncle David" is concerned.

The story makes no sense. Why would anyone agree to be killed- especially someone as drop dead gorgeous as Ashley? It's hinted that he's pimped out and damaged, but there isn't enough of that in his portrayal. What we get instead is a surprisingly good turn from a porn star. His childlike innocence came across really well, and heightened the creepiness. Sure, he wasn't overly convincing with a lot of the lines but non-verbally he was spot on. I guess that's what we should expect from someone who works with his body for a living.

No, the real problem here is two-fold. The first issue is that the plot is never explained. There is little or no exposition, just hints in between endless Hoyle diatribes about the stultifying naffness of heterosexuals. One gets the impression Hoyle is an intelligent man, but he's no academic and it shows. His philosophies are all fatally flawed and hopelessly immature. The world doesn't work like that, David. Get with it or get off it. We're all doing our best to make it less crappy, and all I hear from you is an unrelenting superior air wrapped in student nihilism. I suppose it's fitting therefore, that the main problem with this film was actually his performance, which is best described as moribund. Unlike his alter ego The Divine David, Hoyle in his 'undressed' form which we must assume is the 'real' him has nothing about him of interest. This would no doubt be death to him, to be found so unremarkable. So ordinary. You could find hundreds of Uncle Davids in divey gay bars any day of the week- just another bitter old queen. Perhaps that was meant to be the point of the performance but given the persistent Hoyle philosophy I doubt it.

As a gay man I find this humourless portrayal of intergenerational and incestuous homosexual love to be insultingly stereotypical. Here was an opportunity for a bit of irony, a bit of black humour, something perversely wonderful in a John Waters fashion, completely wasted on some sort of poor attempt at a modern day mythological tragedy. Way to reinforce the creepy uncle gay stereotype, Hoyle!