Review of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009) by Seth S — 25 Jul 2014

I was primed. I was ready. I couldn't wait to thrash Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. While I hadn't actually watched the movie up till this point, I had seen enough of it on TV, I had read enough reviews, I had seen enough flaming mad reactions to believe that this would be a colossal atrocity that would make the first movie look like a masterpiece.

Many would call Revenge of the Fallen a perfect example of everything wrong with the modern American blockbuster. And they would be correct. The movie is way too long, it's stupid, it's boring, it's offensive, it's demeaning, it's loud, oh, and did I mention that it's stupid? Yes, the movie lives up to its reputation ... in a way.

A quick check of the Tomatometer will show that Transformers scored a 57% with critics. You'll also notice that Revenge of the Fallen scored a dismal 19%. And why is that? ... I honestly have no idea. If you didn't like the first movie, than I can perfectly understand not liking the second. That's the boat I'm in. But if you like the first movie, then explain to me why you dislike the second. Because both movies are exactly the same. The same overbearing action from the first? Present and accounted for in the sequel. The same goofy and obnoxious characters? Check. Equally preposterous stories in both movies? You betcha. Crass humor? Delivered in spades, twice.

Everything, good and bad, from Transformers is carried over to the sequel. The only difference is that Revenge of the Fallen is more aggressive and confident in its lousiness. The sequel should have been titled Transformers: The Same, But More So.

Of all the horrible things in this movie - and there are some doozies, the racist humor being of special consideration - the biggest problem with this film is the simple fact that it's boring. Really boring. It took me two sittings to get through the whole movie. Right before all the characters move to Egypt to take part in the finale, I just clocked out. It was too bland. Too clanging. Too much of a muchness. Thankfully, after waiting a few days, I was able to catch a second-wind for the last hour of the movie. And I actually found some of the climatic moments to be oddly compelling. Weird...

There are some definite improvements this time around. The Sam/Mikaela relationship isn't as dumb. With the awkward genesis of their relationship out of the way, it's easier to just accept that they are together. The action and special effects are better. There are actually some memorable moments in the fight scenes (something that was sorely lacking in the first movie). The Optimus forrest battle is surprisingly effective. Bumblebee's wild rampage on some Decepticons in the finale is undeniably cool. In short, the "action moments" are more satisfying in this sequel. Plus, the emotional core of the film functions on a higher level than its predecessor.

Shia LaBeouf returns as Sam Witwicky. Overall, I think his performance is slightly improved. He's still bloody awful at times, but the dramatic stuff actually works as the movie progresses. The character just came off as a bit more sincere than he was in the last movie. Megan Fox also returns as Mikaela. Like LaBeouf, she is slightly improved here, though still not anything special. But let's be honest, one of the main reasons why this movie was a smashing hit at the box office was because of Megan Fox's unavoidably good looks. And in that one way, the movie certainly does not disappoint.

There aren't a whole lot of new additions to the cast. Josh Duhamel, Tyrese Gibson, Kevin Dunn, Julia White, and John Turturro all return for a second offering. Dunn and White, playing Sam's parents, are probably the worst characters in the movie. If you've seen the movie, then you'll know why. But I'll just say that it's painful to watch. Duhamel and Gibson are delegated the task of dry exposition and action hero - heroic stuff.

I mentioned how similar the first two movies in this series are, but the one main way that they're different is that Revenge of the Fallen focuses a lot more on the mythology of the Transformers. The first movie was basically just two warring Cybertron tribes duking it out on earth. The sequel at least pulls back to show the universe a bit more clearly. It really delves into the lore surrounding the gigantic robots. Which is only marginally interesting, but at least it puts in the effort.

I had mixed feelings toward the music of the first Transformers movie. My mixed feelings are flipped for the sequel. I hated the song choices in the first, but enjoyed the score. I was disappointed with the score to the second, but I generally didn't mind the song choices. Linkin Park's song "New Divide" and Green Day's "21 Guns" are the featured songs. The former fits the movie like a glove, and the latter works well enough. But Steve Jablonsky's score is a marked step down from the first. It offers nothing new, while crashing along in the background, always a decibel too loud.

Michael Bay was put in a uniquely horrible situation with this sequel. Not only did he have to churn it out as soon as possible (only two years after the first), but he also had to deal with the writers strike of '07-'08. So with that in mind, and with the generally venomous opinion towards this film - I was shocked to find that Revenge of the Fallen is no worse than Transformers. Yes, everything bad you've heard about this movie is true. But everything bad you've heard about this movie is also true of the first.

And because of the afore mentioned reason, I think that this movie deserves a little defending. Not to the point where I'd actually give it a positive review, because it's still atrocious. But if asked to choose between the first or second movie, I'm probably standing up for Revenge of the Fallen (if only on the principle of the thing).

"Our races, united by a history long forgotten and a future we shall face together. I am Optimus Prime, and I send this message so that our past will always be remembered. For in those memories, we live on." 4/10.