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Review of by Courtney W — 02 Apr 2006

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[color=lemonchiffon]I think that my friends and I could possibly be movie masochists. We watch knowingly bad films and make fun of them for our own pleasure. We have fun by watching terrible and painful films.[/color].

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[color=#fffacd]First, we watched [i]Total Eclipse[/i]. Wherein none other than Leonardo DiCaprio (back in '95, too--when he looked like he was 12) and Professor Lupin (hehe, David Thewlis) play contemporary French poets who engage in a torrid, sexual affair. Much more graphic than [i]Brokeback Mountain[/i]. It also suffers from the cast being comprised of all these actors from all over the world. Thewlis is British (which could be feasible because of Britain's proximity to France) and DiCaprio is supposed to be French, but doesn't even attempt to be anything other than American. Huh. It was really bad. This movie was hackneyed with the plot and then I hated both of the characters. Thewlis sets his wife's hair on fire and pushes his baby in it's cradle against the wall. What a Jerk. DiCaprio could best be described as a turd. At least there was tenderness in [i]Brokeback[/i] and a sort of melancholy. [/color].

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[color=#fffacd]And to think River Phoenix was originally supposed to play DiCaprio's part. *Shudder*. I love River Phoenix and he was too good for the script.[/color].

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[color=#fffacd]I watched [i]The Squid and the Whale[/i] on my own. I had heard a lot of raves about it and Wes Anderson was a producer and I love his films. I have to say, that it stands as a testament to what parents can do to their kids during an ugly divorce...and it also warns you about psuedo-intellectual, pretentious people like Jeff Daniels character. [/color].

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[color=#fffacd]One son (Jesse Eisenberg) regurgitates everything his pretentious father says, claims penning the Pink Floyd song "Hey You" and generally distrusts and does not like his mother (Laura Linney). Then the younger son (Owen Kline--the offspring of Phoebe Cates and Kevin Kline) takes to drinking at the ripe old age of 10 and then masturbating all over the school and wiping the results on books and lockers. Eeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwww! That part thouroughly disturbed me, along with the fact that Jeff Daniels has a few sexual encounters with Anna Paquin's character. They were father and daughter in [i]Fly Away Home[/i]. EWWWWWWWWWWW![/color].

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[color=#fffacd]On friday night, we ventured to the cineplex to see [i]Inside Man[/i]. What a great film. Denzel Washington, Jodie Foster (who was the anti-Jodie Foster in the film--it didn't even look like her), Clive Owen (so handsome...I hated that he spent most of the movie behind the bank robber's mask), Christopher Plummer and Willem Dafoe. What a great cast. It is a great, funny film that plays a bunch of mind games with you. Spike Lee did a fantastic job. I loved the fact that I figured it all out two seconds before the reveal. It hit me like a freight train. I was kicking myself for not getting it sooner. I want to see it again just to see what clues I missed along the way. [/color].

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[color=#fffacd]Well, that is all for now.[/color].

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[color=#fffacd]Laters.[/color].

[color=#fffacd]Court[/color].

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This review of Total Eclipse (1995) was written by on 02 Apr 2006.

Total Eclipse has generally received mixed reviews.

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