Review of Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri (2017) by Jenna I — 06 Feb 2018

What the hell???????? First off, Martin McDonagh has never been to rural America and if he has, he's never spoken to a single person there. Also he clearly didn't get a beer there because no goddamn dive bar would ever serve an $8 beer in rural Missouri. That's New York City prices. It's also clear from the poorly written dialogue, which is unrealistic and bizarre - they all talk like inner city chavs but with southern accents. Americans don't banter the word 'cunt' around to their damn parents in loving jest, lord almighty. Also who the hell writes a suicide note about how wonderful it was with "me inside of you and you on top of me and barely a fleeting thought of the darkness to come." The dialogue in this movie is big-time trash.

Then there's the completely insensitive and equally nonsensical 'commentary' about women, race and cops. All broken up with moments of tone-deaf levity because ha-ha we're all here to have fun and learn, guys! For a movie that's about a woman who was raped and murdered by being set on fire, it clearly doesn't give a shit about her. The only scene we see is how this daughter calls her mom a cunt and says "I HOPE I GET RAPED" before she leaves the house. Wow great character building.

And as for the racial commentary.... theres like three black characters here who are all interchangeably nondescript and then there's "Latino 1" and "Latino 2" in the cast list which I think kinda shows you the depth of the 'commentary' there.

THEN you have the 'bad cops' who are dumb as bricks and violent because gosh darn tootin' thats just what they do! And like, listen, there are SO MANY corrupt cops out there in real life, but to dismiss them as so stupid they wouldn't be able to tell if a windowed building they're inside of is being fire bombed until it was too late like.... It undercuts any actual points you want to make about police violence. These idiots exist and there's plenty of real life examples with real life 'excuses' and 'explanations' for why they act like disgusting pigs. Why did McDonagh feel the need to sketch from his head when theres literally stacks of real life material to work from?? Why would you throw those real life examples (that you can find by even googling like 'police violence,' bare minimum) out of the window for a wile e coyote-styled violent casual racist with no rhyme or reason other than stupidity the likes of which doesn't even exist. And then take that character and save HIM and redeem HIM of all characters at the end of this waste of time? Nothing changes for the mother what so ever but this motherfker gets a redemption arc and all of the spotlight at the end of the film??? Wow, great and wonderful. Glad this movie that was meant to be about a raped and murdered young woman solves a lot of things for this idiot man and allows him to grow.

Speaking of - then this movie ENDS as if the entire point of this garbage fire was just a lead up prequel for Dirty Harry: Missouri or some shit. like, cool. Great. White people working together. Im so glad this overly progressive yet stoic 'rural'-caricature of a mother of a murdered woman and this racist cop who threw a man out of a window could see eye to eye. God bless America.

What a waste of time and talented actors doing their worst. I can't handle movies like this that treat their audience like morons.