Review of The Wolverine (2013) by Templescroll — 25 Aug 2013

If you like martial arts you might want to check out the new WOLVERINE movie. I don’t know why they call the movie “WOLVERINE” cuz Hugh Jackman has nothing to do with any of the plot of characters until the last 10 minutes of the movie if you exclude the brief yet passionless encounter between Jackman and a young woman.

But the Wolverine does make an interesting ally for the movie’s warring gang factions. I suppose the producer also needed a ‘superstar’ to pander his Kung Fu movie since Hugh Jackman is the only white guy along with some toxic blond who struts around in Jimmy Chu’s and spends most of the movie deep throating her venomous forked tongue into unsuspecting male admirers.

Again, why this character is in the movie, makes no sense other than erotic and to push the envelope of the R rating. This having been said, the movie was only okay because the ‘flow’ (I use the term loosely) is constantly interrupted by the need for another martial arts battle.

It got boring for me after like the 10th battle and each battle goes on for a while.The giant metal samurai battle at the end was laughable, sorry. Its probably me and I don’t mean to sound jaded (no pun intended) but after having seen Crouching Tiger nothing really impresses me in this arena.

If you’re going to do a 2 hr. martial arts movie you had better have awesome dialogue and impressive plot/characters.With the exception of Wolverine this had neither. So going full circle, this is why the movie is called WOLVERINE.

But don’t be disheartened X-Men fans. There was an interesting ‘teaser’ at the end with Magneto and Xavier which shows promise for the NEXT X-Men Wolverine release. On the upside PIXAR and DISNEY have a slew of new releases coming out in genuine ADHD guaranteed to keep the little tikes bouncing off the wall way past their bedtime.