Review of The Whole Nine Yards (2000) by Eric H — 23 Apr 2014

This is a supreme example of the lazy, unimaginative film-making that has given Hollywood a bad name over the last twenty years. Matthew Perry (he of Friends fame) is Oz, a dentist with a horrible wife (Rosanna Arquette, with a 'comedy' French accent). His world is turned upside down when Jimmy 'The Tulip' Tudeski (Bruce Willis), a famous hitman, moves in next door. You see what I mean? It's creaky already. Throw in some tedious plot about gangsters killing each other and the truly unlikely idea of Natasha Henstridge falling for Perry and what emerges is an over-long sub-Sopranos crime comedy-thriller with no thrills and no discernible jokes.

The problem is with Perry, really. He is rightly praised for his role in Friends, where he is both charming and genuinely funny. Unfortunately, this film uses all the least funny and least charming aspects of Chandler, namely, his slapstick shtick and gormless loser routines. As a stinging wit, he is very good - here, he is forced to play the straight man to Willis's grinning hitman and it just doesn't work. This is isn't just a bad film, but an unforgivable waste of talent and promise as well.