Review of The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010) by Roddersj04 — 29 Dec 2010

Okay, seriously? This is what some people consider to be a good film? This is what people were up at midnight to see? You gotta pray for humanity, even if you don't believe in God. Okay, opening rant aside, lets move onto the actual film review.

This films plot is less stupid than New Moon. Here, it's basically Newborn Vampires VS The Cullens and Jacobs Pack. The problem with that is that the Newborns are hugely anticipated and so built up, but, the fight lasts barely a minute, and they don't even do damage against the good guys.

Bella's a **** There she is stringing Jacob along, when we all know she'll choose Edward over him. Heck, they're discussing him turning her at the beginning of the film. Poor Jacob, his heart being played like some toy.

The dialogue was crap. This is an actual piece of dialogue. Charlie Swan: What's going on? Jacob Black: [pause] I kissed Bella. [pause] Jacob Black: And she broke her hand. [pause] Jacob Black: Punching my face.

[pause] Jacob Black: It was a complete misunderstanding. Whoever wrote dialogue like that probably wrote for Andromeda. The troubling thing is that in the theater I was in, people actually laughed at that dialogue.

They'd probably have laughed if someone just got up their and jingled a bunch of keys. And we're supposed to believe that Bella and Edward are in love? They have as much chemistry as a rapist and his victim.

And Edward still looks like a **** with his pale ass face, his disco ball impressions in the sunlight and hair being 95% gel I will add one positive thing: Bryce Dallas Howard and Ashley Greene are beautiful! Thats the only good thing I can say about this piece of crapola.

To close this review, If you see a twilight fan who calls this the best film of the year, do the right thing.