Review of The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010) by Heather H — 07 May 2012

Though many adults love it, at its core, the Twilight series is supernatural love story for hormonal teenagers. The first two films had lugubrious pacing and turgid emo romance instead of plot. This third installment is more humorous, and-forgive this joke about a vampire film-more lively. It's still shallow, but at least it doesn't completely suck... (Sorry.).

In the last flick, Stewart made a bargain with vampire Pattinson, she would marry him if he turned her into a one of his wildlife-eating, pace-and-love vampires. (They're too moral to feed on humans). Lautner, a local Native American hottie, showed Stewart she had other options. His tribespeople are werewolves sworn to protect humankind from the walking dead. In this installment, a vengeful gang of bloodsuckers plan to kill Stewart. So, the supernatural enemies team up to protect Stewart while she decides between loving a dog-man or a vampire.

As silly as this movie is, it's nice to finally have a plot! Bolstering this drippy, teenaged romance is actual action and bits of comedy. Pubescent and mostly shirtless Lautner doesn't quite yet have the chops for the dramatic moments. However, Pattinson and Stewart sometimes act almost as much as they strike poses.

Still, these lusty youngsters spend a bit of celluloid talking about true love as if their lives-and afterlives-completely depended on it. Vampires and werewolves, I can believe in; a deep and successful teenage marriage is a little harder to swallow.