Review of The Three Musketeers (2011) by Jay B — 18 Apr 2012

This movie combines things that should be awesome - an almost steampunk re-telling of Dumas' story, Ray Stevenson as Porthos, Christoph Waltz as Cardinal Richelieu, Mads Mikkelsen as Rochefort... and then craps all over them with cheesey, ridiculous nonsense. I swear half of this movie is stolen from the 1993 movie with Sheen, Sutherland and Platt (with one scene being an almost shot for shot remake) and the other half is Anderson trying to remake Pirates of the Caribbean (Orlando Blooms presence and the eerily familiar score do nothing to assuage these suspicions...).

I put this on expecting mindless, silly, fun, but hoping for more. I got what I expected, nothing more.

Paul W.S. Anderson, on behalf of the movie-going world - please, please, please... stop.