Review of The Thing (2011) by Christian L — 15 Apr 2012

Where to start with this?

The original is one of the greatest horror movies ever! From the story, to the charachters, to the dialog to the cinematography, to the special effects, pretty much everything about this movie is pure horror awesomeness.

So I understand why someone would TRY to recreate some of that magic, but this remake/prequel, as most of them unfortunately, falls flat on it's face!

The movie starts out fair enough, with some nice shots of the UFO and alien frozen under the ice. There are some clichà (C)d lines about "a storm coming in" and Mary Winstead, as the lead character hadn't conviced me yet, but I hoped and thought it would pass, with some innovative camera angles and lighting not overexposing the creature and the actors falling into madness.

MAN, was I ever wrong!!

The first few minutes after the creature escapes are actually very cool. There are some dark shots of it lying under a building and eating a dude, that are very good and reminded me of the original.

But then it goes completely downhill from there.

The director NEVER manages to capture the paranoia and the dread, that made the original stand out. It never get's half as intense, it never really gets u wondering what might happen next.

Half-assed acting along with TERRIBLE CGI crashed this movie. Mary Winstead is totally lost and unconvincing as a lead, the director fails to make you care about the characters, so when they die of, one is left thinking "So?".

What also made the original was the fact, that you never really saw the "monster", just parts of it and that worked out brilliant and added to the suspense.

This remake/prequel just goes all out, by showing way to much.

I'll say, that the scene with the huge mouth running around was cool, but the rest, especially the "inverted guy" towards the end, was just idiotic.

And to top it off, the ending is 999% flat! It just sorta ends, with a somewhat predictable outcome and you're just left thinking that this could've been SOOOO much better.

All in all, the movie suffers from being too "American"!!

It dwells on quick choks and gross-out effect, but fails at both. I really don't know, or care, if this shit works in the US, perhaps some braindead teens will find this scary, but at the end, it's instantly forgettable and inconsequential.

Watch the first 20-25 min., then turn it off, you'll miss absolutely NOTHIING!!