Review of The Star Wars Holiday Special (1978) by Cory P — 02 Jan 2008

Wow. Utterly fascinating.

I'm not sure if I can give this movie simultaneous BOTH half a star AND 5 stars...so I'll give it five stars for earning so much, and so little, of my admiration. This movie gave me insights I never expected about Wookie culture (turns out they all speak english, have sexual fantasies about human women, are marginalized by white colonists, and live in swanky 70s-era California suburbanite-style tree houses) and the rest of the Star Wars universe (Bea Arthur runs the Mos Eisley cantina!?), and managed to provide me with a uniquely-hallucinogenic movie-viewing experience I didn't think was possible without about 6 pounds of genetically-altered super mushrooms dipped in crazy sauce condensed from the drippings of the Guatemalan Insanity Pepper and mixed with the tears of unicorns and the butt sweat of Satan.

I suspect that this movie was inspired by someone's crazy dengue fever dream. Easily the weirdest god damn thing I've ever seen in my life...

You should both NEVER see this film, AND run out and see it RIGHT FUCKING NOW.

I'm going to pick up the chunks of brains this movie forced to drip out of my skull now.

HAPPY LIFE DAY!!!