Review of The Room (2003) by Eero V — 12 Jan 2015

There is truly no other film like The Room. Tommy Wiseau's cinematic masturbation project is one of the most unspeakably terrible atrocities ever put to screen, and also one of the most hilarious unintentional comedies ever made.

Most masterpieces last repeated viewings because each viewing offers new perspectives and details about the story. The Room, on the other hand, will stand the test of time because each additional viewing will reveal more and more mistakes from it.

Whether it's the meaningless subplots, inconsistent writing (if the word "writing" even suits the film), flabbergastingly awful dialogue, Wiseau's out-of-place chicken imitations (and his uncanny outfit) or the pathetic acting, the film always has you looking for new illogicalities and all the while laughing at the sheer ineptitude of it all.

Watching Wiseau struggling to express genuine emotion in the lead role is simultaneously horrifying and incredibly comical, and every other performance is so amateurish and phoned-in that they make even Steven Seagal and Keanu Reeves look like fine Shakespearean professionals.

The Room hooks you from the start, stupefies you, has you exploding in laughter, covering your eyes (especially during the sex scenes), and wanting to shoot yourself in the head with a nuclear missile.

It is an achievement that not even the most legendary artists of cinema (Hitchcock, Kubrick, Altman, Kurosawa, Tarkovksy, Bergman) could have accomplished, meaning that none of them could have made a film this incomprehensibly bad.

I simply love it. And believe it or not, Johnny actually did naaat hit Lisa.