Review of The Professionals (1966) by Shawn M — 24 Jul 2008

Someone once insisted that no one but Lee Marvin could play Nick Fury. It's movies like these that really validate that comment.

This is another one of those movies that gets a whole bunch of celebrities and bad-assery ensues in droves. Now, I'm not saying that this movie has the star power of, say, The Magnificent Seven, but Burt Lancaster, Lee Marvin, and Jack Palance in one movie is completely different dynamic than throwing Yul Brynner, Steve McQueen, and Charles Bronson together. Those actors are fantastic actors. Really, putting Burt Lancaster and Lee Marvin on the same screen makes me worry about my wallet and I'll refuse to even glance over at their girlfriends in fear that they'll kick my ass on a whim. Really, this movie smells of testosterone. It's one of those movies that you know things will go well for the characters, but it is going to be a b*tch the entire way through. Things just keep on happening to these characters and they manage to get around these situations.

I'd like to address Jack Palance first of all. Palance is a Ukrainian. Believe me. I have this on the best authority that the man is Ukrainian. Every time my mom sees him on screen, she tells me about how Ukrainian the man is. So seeing him play a Mexican rebel / outlaw is just amusing as hell. We all know that he's as white bread as it gets, but I guess they cared more about getting the most badassness for their buck that they just didn't care what nationality the man carried. Really, I stopped giggling a second in because he's a pretty commanding presence in this movie. That's right. Curly actually does a pretty good job of grabbing attention and keeping it, so I really can't begrudge his performance. He does his job and he does it well.

Now, normally, I'd be talking about how much I am afraid of Lee Marvin and respect his performance out of fear that he'd come back from the dead and kick my ass. (He would, too!) But the real moment in this moment goes to Burt Lancaster. Now, while most of the movie is the Western equivalent of a heist movie, there's one movie that actually allows for drama and tension rather than the simple coolness that the movie naturally exudes. I am speaking of the showdown scene between Lancaster and Palance. Now, let's get this straight. There is some really cool stuff that goes on here. In fact, it is really cool. But there's this odd dramatic tension that goes on. You know that these guys are in the wrong at this point of the film, but there's this duality that you can't deny about their situation. The movie actually turns the viewer into a co-conspirator in this caper and you root for justice to, in fact, fail. How bizarre is that? There's this really dramatic tension when old friends square off. They're all crooks (or have been at some point) and they all knew that this day would come. That's a heck of an acting scene and it really comes off fantastically.

The end is a little too clean for me, but it kind of had to happen. The thing about caper films is that they can't end too perfect for everyone. We live in a world that we need to have justice to some extent. Even anti-heroes deliver some form of justice and that's kind of what we see here. I know that this is the end they had to settle on, but it just seemed a bit out of character for what the movie was all about.

It's a fun action caper movie in a Western format. I won't say it is perfect, but gosh darn it if it isn't fun.