Review of The Nut Job (2014) by Keenan S — 05 Aug 2014

I love animated films. All kinds, in fact. I enjoy Disney films (Both light-hearted and darkly-themed), Dreamworks films, Hiyao Miyazaki's works, Satoshi Kon's works, several different anime films, G-rated, PG-rated, PG-13 rated, R-rated, Unrated, big-budget, so-so-budget, low-budget, unspeakably bad ripoffs (Animated Titanic or Video Brinquedo films, anyone?) - the works. I love all kinds and have raved about many of them, regardless of genre. They've also made me feel and think in a variety of ways: some make me laugh, some make me cry, some intellectually stimulate me, thrill me, engage me, mesmerize me - everything, to say the least.

But, for whatever reason, whenever I encounter an animated film that I hate, something about just pisses me off more than the usual bad films I come across. I can't quite put my finger on it, but the closest I can surmise is that animated films provide a particular magic live action films can rarely replicate as they truly do pull you into their fantasies and can enter a vast realm of creative possibilities. So, when I encounter a bad animated film, it proceeds to punch the joy and magic right out of me, leaving me as one pissed off amateur critic.

The Nut Job gives animated films a bad name. It's because of garbage like this that many people don't take animation as seriously as they should because films like this make animated films look like idiotic, pandering nonsense for the dumbest of children, instead of being open to children and adults alike who like proper craft in storytelling and the overall quality of animated film. Mind you, this certainly isn't the worst animated film I've ever seen (Not by a long shot. I've seen shit so terrible they make The Nut Job look like a masterpiece of animation), but it's certainly among the worst I've ever seen.

The film focuses on an unlikable, asshole squirrel by the name of Surly. Surly is hated by all the animals in the park, and his only friend is a rat named Buddy (Who doesn't speak and gets treated like crap by Surly...because Surly's an asshole). Surly, however, being the narcissistic dick that he is, only looks out for himself, including the frenzied time when all the animals in the area try to gather enough food to last the winter.

When Surly and his friend, Buddy, along with a couple of squirrels from the clan of animals in the park named Andie (The poorly developed love interest) and her bumbling sidekick named Grayson (Who fancies himself to be the hero of the park) get wind of a nut cart nearby, the four of them make a mad dash to steal the nuts so they can last the winter.

However, the heist goes bad when they alert the attention of the guard dog. During the screwed up heist, the cart becomes mobile after a breach of the propane tank, sending the four on a wild ride which ultimately ends when the cart crashes and explodes into a tree...the same tree being used by the park animals to store their food supplies, which subsequently burns down in the ensuing mayhem.

Because of this, Surly is banished from the park for good and forced to go live in the city. His friend, Buddy, tries to tag along, but Surly at first wants nothing to do with him after Buddy accidentally voted for him to be banished. Things don't go well for a little while, including the duo getting into scuffles with some street rats, until they find a nut shop (Which they proceed to dance to Gangnam Style in celebration...even though this film is set in the 50's).

The duo plans to steal the nuts to last the winter, but Andie gets wind of what they found, and after she manages to strike a deal with him during a life-or-death situation, he agrees to share the rewards of the heist with the park animals.

But, while the animals are planning the heist, the owners of the nut shop are planning to rob the bank across the street by digging underground into the vault, stealing the money bags, and replacing the money bags with bags of nuts. Another plan is also being formed by the leader of the park animals named Raccoon (Played by Liam Neeson. Why, Liam Neeson?! Why?!), who intends to not only double-cross Surly, but also the other animals working on the heist because he wants to retain his power over the park animals by holding back on the food supply so they can only rely on him. With so many plans in motion, things are about to go haywire for the various groups.

The story is a disaster. Not only is it filled with rip-offs of Over The Hedge and heist films, but it's also a confusing film to follow. Nothing seems to have any logical flow to it and following what happens becomes a bewildering experience at times because of how badly written is. Plus, topping off a bad storyline with characters who range from annoying to just plain dicks makes for an awful experience because there seems to be no one worth rooting for, especially among the so-called heroes. The heist angle is confusing and cliched, the characters are awful, the jokes are laugh-free and filled with bad puns, it tries to insert heavy drama into the mix (Which is a fatal mistake), and more.

When it comes to the acting, I felt that the cast tried their best with such atrocious material, but only Liam Neeson was able to deliver a genuinely good performance because he made Raccoon more interesting and menacing than what the script called for. His character is one of the only reasons to keep watching the film, but his role seems very short, despite his role in the plot later on. Despite having assembled a solid cast, including ones who are very capable of comedic roles, this film wastes them.

As far as the humor goes, not only I not laugh, but I never even so much as chuckled. One of the biggest problems with the film is its unbearable use of puns, which happen so frequently that less than two minutes into the film, you get two nut puns...and they keep throwing them out pretty much until the end of this turd. Plus, this film also seems to follow the philosophy of, "If it wasn't funny the first time, maybe it'll be funny the second, third, or even the fourth time we tell a joke!" This film commits that sin, and reminds me of the similarly terrible Free Birds which also had several of the same problems. Not only that, but the viewer gets some pop culture references (Whose up for Gangnam Style, not once, but twice?), bad adult humor, bad slapstick humor, terrible scatological jokes, and more.

Though there were some things I liked about The Nut Job like Liam Neeson's performance, the music score (The score, not the songs), the decent chase near the end of the film, and the animation, these things cannot redeem the overwhelming flaws of bad storytelling, awful characters, unfunny humor, and stifling lack of creativity. When The Nut Job 2 comes out (Yes, a sequel is being made), hopefully it will address these numerous flaws and churn out something decent. My fingers crossed for the sequel. In the meantime, go find yourself a better animated film to watch.