Review of The Matrix Revolutions (2003) by Compi24 — 05 Aug 2019

Finally, at long last, I get to meet and shake hands with the film that sunk a thousand ships. The movie that singlehandedly besmirched the integrity of an entire franchise. The cinematic event that added further credence to the old urban legend that the perfect movie trilogy is simply impossible to deliver (though, let's be honest, that was already out the window after "Reloaded," IMO). "The Matrix Revolutions.".

Look. All attempts at stalling aside, this movie is pretty bad. And I know that's not a hot take, but it is my take, so here goes.

I guess this is a war movie. Or something. With dudes in mech suits fighting those giant squid robots. For most of the running time. My God. How did we even get here? I remember the good ol' days, when "The Matrix" meant seeing Neo and Trinity raid a building full of baddies, do somersaults off of the walls, and speed out of there on a bike or in a helicopter. Now we're just. . .in the movie that "Starship Troopers" was a quasi-parody of? And where are Neo, Trinity, and Morpheus anyway? Yes, yes, I know -- Neo and Trinity are on that one ship traveling to the Machine City and Morpheus is at Zion. But WHY are they even in this story? There's a good chunk of time in this where we forget this is even a "Matrix" film, where Neo, Morpheus, and Trinity are sidelined for of characters that I either can't remember or. . .nope, still nothing. And where'd all the philosophical brilliance go? The first "Matrix" film was rife with compelling musings on destiny, humanity's relationship with its machinery, and our entire concept of reality as a whole. Now, all of that's been demoted to painful blather about "the power of love?" I expected better.

The tragic progression of this whole trilogy really makes a case for the reality where the 1999 sci-fi film remained a one-and-done, standalone film with no sequels. Because clearly not even the people who dreamt up that classic romp were capable enough to deliver sequels that were ever going to be equal or better to it. Woulda, coulda, shoulda. What might have been. Something something bird in the hand something something.

Ugh. What a damned shame.