Review of The Marine 2 (2009) by Jason D — 30 Dec 2009

The Marine 2 is the unnecessary, cash-in sequel to the original pile of horseshit that, somehow, was popular enough to warrant such a sequel. This sequel follows new marine Ted DiBiase Jr. (WWF wrester and son to famed classic wrester Ted DiBiase aka The Million Dollar Man) who, after a rough mission, is looking to get away with wife Lara Cox whose job takes her to a beautiful new resort in Southeast Asia.

Before they can enjoy their vacation, the resort is hijacked by a group of separatist terrorists, led by Temuera Morrison (best known as Jango Fett from the newer Star Wars abortions) who take everyone hostage, save for DiBiasi who attempts to start putting a whooping on everyone.

Cult actor Michael Rooker (Mallrats, Slither, Henry, etc) is also along for the rise as a fellow military man/helping hand on the island. Overall, The Marine 2 is definitely an improvement over the first one (which I HATED), however this movie is still kind of a stinker.

The villains are worthless and not at all structured well; just glorified foreign extras. Even Morrison doesn't really do much. As far as DiBiasi goes, he's a worthless hero who constantly gets beaten or one-upped by bad guys and only manages to advance on thanks to sheer luck (no seriously, this happens almost throughout the whole movie.

Worst Hero Ever!). It's really only Rooker who supplies a decent role in the entire damn movie. To top it off, there's LOTS of unintentional humor that comes off as hilarious. Also, I'm never a fan of an American film utilizing a damn-near completely foreign crew (both behind and in front of the camera) all for the purpose of saving money.

Well, I guess you guys get what you pay for. It's a real shame because the story and concept of the film is somewhat different and engaging, however, it's executed horribly. Still, with all these faults, the bad film is still marginally better than the first film.

VERY marginally. It scares me to think that director Roel Reine will next be tackling the direct to DVD, cash-in sequel to Death Race.