Review of The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009) by Thequietgamer — 11 Jan 2017

The horror genre allows for a wide range of possibilities. Different things freak out different people after all. With movies a single disturbing concept can be used to strike fear in the hearts of audiences or get inside their head and screw with their paranoia. Horror can even be used to make people laugh. There are plenty of horror-comedies out there that manage to entertain by poking fun at our terror towards what goes bump in the night. There's simply limitless possibilities for the genre and by being original you can introduce viewers to something new to keep them up at night. I have to give this movie credit for one thing; it certainly is an original idea. I mean, the plot is pretty formulaic, but what writer and director Tom Six is using at the core of the movie to freak you out is without a doubt something original that spawned from his mind. I am of course referring to the bizarre and gross concept of the human centipede itself.

Make no doubts about it, this is gross out body horror if I've ever seen it. Something that's gained the movie quite a reputation. A reputation I find to be quite overblown. Don't get me wrong, it's a nasty idea, but the concept is mercifully muted in execution (thank God!). It doesn't overindulge in all the sick little possibilities that likely could have been easily portrayed onscreen. Instead Tom Six relies simply on the inherent disgustingness of the concept to churn your stomach with little extra help. It's something that makes the movie more watchable. Not that you should watch it.

At the end of the day all the Human Centipede has going for it is the concept itself. One sick idea is not enough to carry a movie. Something Tom Six makes very clear. Once the human centipede is actually constructed there really isn't any point to the movie. You're just watching Dieter Laser be weird and wondering why the movie is still going on.

It all just sort of descends into sadism and cruelty. All of which is really pointless. To make matters worse these victims aren't actually characters. Just bland faces to get stitched up into this hideous creation together. Something that's actually a blessing given that our two amateur female leads can't really act all that well. The dialog they are given doesn't really help either. Dieter Laser is really the only good actor here. Akihiro Kitamura isn't bad, but to be honest I'm not sure if that's because he really is a good actor or just sounds cool shouting in Japanese.

In the end Human Centipede is just a deranged concept with not enough movie to keep it going. As far as it's disgusting reputation goes, it's bark is definitely worse than it's bite. Although to be honest it doesn't have much of a bark either, given that all you've heard about it has been blown wildly out of proportion. It's just a B-rated horror film that does something new, only not so well at all. But hey, at least it's original. It's just not very good.