Review of The Golden Compass (2007) by Michael C — 12 Feb 2011

For Fans Of: HUGE budget films, Fantasy, CGI.

Date Night: Nope.

Art Factor: None.

Fun Factor: Low.

Emotional Factor: None.

Intelligence Factor: Low.

Essential Viewing: No.

The Plot: A young girl embarks on a quest to find missing children and answers about a mysterious compass and her past.

10 Quick Hits.

1) Daniel Craig is in this. Daniel Craig is great when he is on screen, all 8 minutes of it.

2) Nicole Kidman and her way too botoxed face is super creepy. Part of it is that her characyer is suposed to be. Most of it is that weird ass forehead she has from all the botox.

3) If you have issues with metaphors that elude to what some see as the oppressiveness of organized religion then you probably want to skip this one.

4) The special fx are stunning and for all you fx geeks you might have to see this just for that reason.

5) Dakota Blue Richards, the films young lead, is, well, she's better than those damn Narnia kids.

6) At a budget of around $180,000,000.00 this ranks in the top 15 most expensive movies ever made. Ouch, huh New line Cinema?

7) Sam Elliot shows up to play a cowboy type. It may not be a stretch role, but man you just have to admire how good Sam Elliot is at playing cowboy type.

8) Ian McKellen voice acting as a polar bear is as rewarding as Liam Neeson playing a talking Lion. Hopefully the last Narnia refrence I drop in this review.

9) The script, and the entire movie for that matter, have the feel of to many hands trying to give it direction. It makes you thankful for how singular Peter Jackson was allowed to be in his making of Rings.

10) Eva Green being cast as witch who speaks like she is high off her ass was a true stroke of genius.

Final Thought.

All the pieces are there, they just never gel. With a stronger director and a more fluid script I have no doubt we would be gearing up for the next installment in the trilogy to be released in theaters. I will say that if I were a parent there is no way I would let a child younger than say 8 or 9 see this one. Much more violen than the early Potter stuff and much darker than Narnia. I hate to harp but I keep coming back to the same thought, "What might have been?".