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Last updated: 19 Jul 2026 at 17:04 UTC

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Review of by Creme F — 07 Jul 2009

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Why do people like this movie? It SUCKED. Absolutely nothing fit, including the basic premise of the movie where a super hot porn star catches a nerdy high school senior peeping on her and then they are in love?!? Not to mention her stupid friend who is all of a sudden buddy buddy with all those geeky high schoolers, not to mention how he just forces the kid out of school and nobody does anything, not to mention how the kid (after on E) gives an absolutely terrible attempt at a love speech in a speech that is supposed to be about moral fiber for a very important scholarship (and of course he gets a standing ovation for the piece of shit), not to mention the dumbest idea of the porn video during prom or the even dumber twist that the dude somehow managed to just STEAL the tape.

No no no no NO! This movie is the WORST of the typical high school/prom/underdog guy gets girl/teen love story genre I have ever seen and probably gets in without question in the Top 15 worst movies I have ever seen.

It takes the most cliched teen genre ever and throws in tits and porn stars (tho I have to admit that cuthbert is HOT as hell and the sole reason I even gave this movie 1 star) to try to make it more American Pie.

There was no emotion at all. At ALL. I think I laughed maybe 2x (and it was forced). The entire plot and unfolding of events is so ridiculous, so absurd, so pathetic, that one cannot take this movie seriously at all.

I even went into it 'not taking it serious' and not expecting to laugh or like it and it dipped below that.

This review of The Girl Next Door (2004) was written by on 07 Jul 2009.

The Girl Next Door has generally received positive reviews.

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