Review of The FP (2011) by Dan T — 14 Oct 2012

The FP.

In a post apocalyptic future, gangs 248 and 245 are at war with each other. The FP is the town in which this movie takes place. Brothers Jtro and Btro brothers and members of the 248 are competing in a match of "Beat-Beat Revelation" against the 245 led by L Dubba E.

Brother Jtro makes quick work of his foe.

Btro faces off against LDubba E.

"What are you for halloween? A butch? I hope you're ready for this shit cranberry juice! Cause you're about to get fucked bitch!".

Btro suffers a Beat-Beat execution, falling to his knees, into his brothers arms in an extremely dramatic scene.

"Btro get up! Get up man! Remember we live together we die together!".

Jtro dies in his arms.

Announcer and friend KCDC finishes up the 10 second countdown.

"187... 187 dawg. Btro got 187'ed.".

Jtro vows to never play BBR ever again, then the camera pans out as he screams in pain for his tough loss.

He takes a lumberjack job and is visited by KCDC a year after the event.

Jtro almost refuses to talk to him, wondering off from a hard day at work.

"Yo dog, Btro had me promise him, if anything were to happen to him, I'd look out for you. There ain't no way I'm breaking that promise." Says KCDC.

Jtro looks back and agrees to go with him.

They go to 248 member BLT's house. KCDC starts to explain what's going on and why Jtro needs to defeat L Dubba E.

"After Btro got 187ed, the 248 lost its shit. The 245 has taken over. L Dubba E got even more street cred now cause his pops took a dirt nap. Left him Dawn's liquor Mart son. So now no one drinks unless L Dubba E says so. God damn drunks going straight edge right on the streets! Now without drunks, there ain't no Bums! And with no Bums there ain't no motha fuckers to feed the ducks at the park. What's a fucking town with no ducks Jtro? IT'S NOTHIN!".

This entire scene cracked my up so much. It's so damn stupid.

He agrees to train and prepare for a match against L Dubba E.

The movies soundtrack consists basically of girly techno music. Jtro has a bunch of training montages and now has to fight Triple Decka 1K.

"You ain't gonna waste my fucking time unless you prove you got what it takes to be the fuckin' man!" - L Dubba E.

He defeats Triple Decka 1K with ease and now has to defeat L Dubba E.

Jtro goes through a few more training montages and is finally ready to 187 L Dubba E.

I don't want to spoil the movies ridiculously awesome ending, but you need to see it.

The FP is a brilliant satire that is self aware. The movie is so stupid and the characters are dumb as hell. Everyone also speaks in a form of Ebonics calling each other "n**ger" all of the time(there isn't a single black person in the movie mind you).

L Dubba E cracks has so many amazing one liners that will have you on the floor laughing. It's a movie that needs to be seen. Most people wouldn't believe a DDR movie would exist, let alone one about ghetto white gangsters who play it as a form of smack talk. The fact that the bad guy L Dubba E ruined the FP by taking alcohol AWAY from people, in turn causing there to be a lack of bums to feed the ducks, is just so awesome. The characters themselves are extremely memorable, even though they are just so damn stupid.

The movie has enough of a budget to make hilarious, yet believable sets and ridiculously awesome costumes. Add the cheesy and girly techno music to over serious characters and a serious plot, just makes everything so awesome.

You need to see this masterpiece and I know you will enjoy it if you don't take it seriously(obviously).

5/5.