Review of The Fog (2005) by Tim B — 20 Feb 2010

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. It didn't take me long into this one to realize I made a terrible mistake in wasting my time and money. If you thought the original was slow, try an even slower pace with a story that doesn't progress in the least bit.

There are jump scares that you'll see a million miles away, a tacky subplot involving the ghosts that was boring and a chick walking around town, talking to people about things we already know. No build-ups, no momentum, no suspense.

Nothing. The characters were really bad too. Issues involving the characters would be mentioned and then never spoken of again. They also felt the need to inolve the token black guy who says hilarious things all the time (not).

Tom Welling walks around a bit and takes his shirt off. Maggie Grace doesn't do much except look oddly at people but she was fine. Selma Blair was the best of the actors here and despite her shoddily written character, I still warmed up to her.

DeRay Davis was fine but it's whom he played that I hated. I will admit to digging the odd shot by Rupert Wainwright and the cinematography was impressive, but there's no atmosphere, the pace was ridiculously slow and the script was horrible to begin with.

On top of this you get lame looking CGI ghosts that couldn't scare a two year old, a setting that wasn't used (light house... why did you bother?), an ending that had me laughing at how lame (and predictable) it was and you get one of the worst remakes (movies) I have ever seen.

I can't even waste my time writing on it. Rent the original or just don't bother.