Review of The Counselor (2013) by Foxgrove — 18 Nov 2013

'It's all exclaims Brad Pitt at his first meeting with councelor Michael Fassbender. This aptly sums up the first 70 minutes of this unpleasant, uneven and muddled movie. Repugnant characters pose petentiously whilst being the mouthpiece for many risible lines of dialogue ('Truth has no temperature', anyone!).

A list actors (well, sort of) obviously think they are making an important quality picture, and why shouldn't they? After all Ridley Scott is directing. Well, maybe directing is not the right word as this is one hell of a mis guided movie.

We are in a world of people who talk about sex all the time and keep cheetah's as pets. No cats and dogs for this unpleasant group. This is a world where adults act like spoilt children who have just learnt how to swear. To be fair (and I don't really feel inclined to be) once Fassbender's life starts to unravel the film jumps a few notches on the entertainment barometer but make no mistake this is not a good movie by any stretch of the imagination.

It's hard to judge the performances as everyone is so uncharismatic and un-likeable, but Fassbender, slumming it here, is reliably good. Pitt and Bardem seem to be parodying earlier and better roles. Cruz is wasted in both senses of the word and so It is left to Diaz to shine (and I use the word loosely) as a deadlier than the male femme fatale. Her antics on the windshield of Bardem's car, however, really doesn't add anything to the proceedings unless you count me audibly eliciting two words, one of which was a bored expletive. This councelor really should have taken some councelling.