Review of The Cabin in the Woods (2012) by Poliskanin — 07 Feb 2014
The film starts an d you see all these drawings, some kid's got too creative? I mean what! This old guy compplains that its hard to open his draws. OH MY GOD! He then says you can't trust Swedes. Oi. Then a super sexy scene comes one where you see the main girl in panties.
Ooh. Put some clothes on. The swag-mobile then comes. Oh, and he looks like Shaggy from Scooby Doo. I like food.Missy then says that she hopes THE ONLY ROAD is the right road, even though theres no other roads to go down.
Old man cliche.. Theres then a long scene about how that old man is on speakerphone. The old men think its the funniest **** Shaggy then thinks a wolf is a moose. He never did learn any skills in Scooby Doo apart from being scared.
Theres then another sexy sexy sexy scene, this time with beastiality. Shaggy then thinks puppeteers are pop tarts. *clap clap clap*. More s3xy scenes, this time with a tit cliche *Adjusts knob* **** puppet dance.
The girl's head is then thrown into the main girl's hands. And that is why you should always stay clothed. INDIANA JONES MOMENT... and he's dead. A zombie arm then makes Shaggy dance. MASS MASSACRE! Then along comes the.
.. MERMAN! Some woman having a midlife crisis then calls PBG/Shaggy a fool. Giant gods cliche then happens, but is presented very well, and makes you wonder... would you lose your life for the world? Ok.
That film was amazing. Anyone might think there are cliches, but it's mainly to be self-aware, and makes fun of itself. The ending is a bit... well, it's ok., but the rest of the fiml is near perfect If you are a horror film fan, buy it.
This review of The Cabin in the Woods (2012) was written by Poliskanin on 07 Feb 2014.
The Cabin in the Woods has generally received positive reviews.
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