Review of The ABCs of Death (2013) by Brandon W — 12 Mar 2015

Consider that there's 26 short films in this movie, I'll make it short for them.

A is for Apocalypse: It has some darkly funny moments, and some cool effects, but it's not really that scary and it felt like it was just there. Not really a great start for the movie.

B is for Bigfoot: There's some dark humor moments in it that are effective, and there's some messed up moments that'll surprise the parents. It's a decent segment that has effectively creepy make-up.

C is for Cycle: This segment doesn't make sense. How does the guy not know about this? It's confusing, and it could've been creepy but fails to be.

D is for Dogfight: It's a really cool segment that has some good fights in it. The slow motion shots are really good, and actually quite sad in a way that is very deep.

E is for Exterminate: There is a way to make a creepy segment out of spiders, but this is not the way with horrible effects, bad acting and is not even scary at all.

F is for Fart: That's the weirdest thing I have ever seen, and that's saying something from me. It has funny moments, and weird effects that's actually fitting to the segment.

G is for Gravity: I get why it's called that, but the segment serve no purpose as to why it's scary or funny, it's just about a guy doing this thing, but suddenly that happened. It makes it sound like there's more to it, but trust me, it's not.

H is for Hydro-Electric Diffusion: I take that back, this is even weirder than F is for Fart. It's like a crazy animation that was created but instead is live-action. The costumes and make-up are fantastic and it has some wacky laughs that'll get the horror fans entertained.

I is for Ingrown: Although it's a really short segment, it's a messed up one that talks about her life and her "being" here that seems more like a poem from the way it's written which is really cool.

J is for Jidai-Geki: This segment has some really funny moments, some disturbing imagery, and cool effects to show how weird and different it is from other samurai movies.

K is for Klutz: Klutz is a bit of an understatement here, it's so stupid, but in a bit of an enjoyable way that has great animation here.

L is for Libido: That was a disturbing segment, it's like something that you see in Saw, but surprisingly more screwed up. It's messed up of what they have to do, even if they have to do it anyway, and it's really creepy.

M is for Miscarriage: Well that segment sucked, everybody has talked about this being the worst one, and I can see why. It serves even less purpose than G is for Gravity, it seem like it's just something that a director makes from his rear end, makes it even worse when it's from Ti West who I know is a good horror director, and it shows that he way more better making movies than making segments, especially if it's about almost nothing.

N is for Nuptials: It has a simple premise that seems to be a reason for a killing, but it's really funny that actually saves it from being bad.

O is for Orgasm: It is what it is, it was pretty much an artsy porn segment with a killing twist in it. It has some cool visuals, but it's a pointless segment that wasn't scary nor the imagery.

P is for Pressure: It's actually refreshing to see the short tell the story by just showing us and not telling us what the plot is. It's really shocking and is a bit disturbing too. I felt bad for the main girl, until the ending happened and when she's just being happy and all that, made me felt really disturbed, but in an effective way.

Q is for Quack: This segment is one of the best so far, the moment that they were making fun of the fact that they got the letter Q is just hilarious, the acting is really good from director Adam Wingard and writer Simon Barrett, and the meta is really good and never seem to be in your face or anything. At least this segment is trying to be original unlike most of the segments.

R is for Removed: It seem like it had a fairly solid plot, but it felt like it got overshadowed by the gory effects which I felt like they were trying too hard to be gross and end up by being meh.

S is for Speed: This is basically a high budget commerical that shows what you think might happen, would eventually kill you. It's fine for what it is, even if it has some stupid moments, but it's forgettable at the very best.

T is for Toilet: This is definitely one of the most thought out segments in the movie. The animation is impressive, has some dark humor that are effective, and it's trying to be a bit scary with some imagery and gore effects that are downright disgusting, but very creepy.

U is for Unearthed: This is one of the coolest segments in this as it's fast paced very well, really good direction by Ben Wheatley, has great acting in it, and leaves you really wondering about what's going on that leaves in to interpretation effectively.

V is for Vagitus: It's also an another cool segment, but it is downright confusing and makes no sense. The effects are great and the acting is really good, but it shouldn't be a segment in a horror anthology film and it could've been a movie by itself and it would've been fine that way.

W is for WTF!: That's definitely what people are going to say after this segment, but it seem to be a bit similar to Q is for Quack, and it's not really that funny. The effects are cool though.

X is for XXL: People had said that this segment is one of the most disturbing of all in this movie, and they're right. The plot is simple but very effective for what's coming to it. The gore effects are great, and the imagery is really shocking and just scary to see.

Y is for Young Buck: That's quite a revenge segment that shows that people can do the most craziest things to kill people. It also shows the story and it doesn't tell it, but it uses music which is catchy. The effects are great and just looks very disgusting as usual from these segments.

Z is for Zetsumetsu: Ugh, that segment was awful, it's not funny, it's really racist, and the references to disaster dates that actually happened were really uncomfortable and is just insulting to watch.

It's sad to see that The ABC's of Death start and ended horribly and the movie could've been better with more disturbing segments or more darkly funny segments, but there was so many stupid segments that it just ruined the movie for it and it just turn out to be all right.