Review of Terror Firmer (1999) by Steve H — 25 Sep 2009

Troma's modern classic finds a low-budget film crew filming "Toxic Avenger 4", when a masked killer begins killing off crew members. There's certainly nothing original there, but then again, this IS Troma.

As can be expected, blood & guts fill the screen by the minute, there's lots of sex & nudity, and even Ron Jeremy! Unlike most of Troma's films (the ones they MAKE like "The Toxic Avenger", not the hundreds of others they only distribute like "Surf Nazis Must Die") they've actually made it...funny! Whereas past films "Class of Nuke'em High" and "The Toxic Avenger" were more weird humor/slash gory horror, here the jokes actually seem to work. It's all on parody on daily life on a film shoot with Troma, and head honcho Lloyd Kaufman takes a starring role as the film's blind director, a play on himself. Get it? Troma movies are so bad they must be made by someone blind? It's the biggest fuck you to Hollywood ever seen on film. A film so raunchy, so gory, you don't know whether to puke or laugh you ass off.

A subplot featuring a romance between Alyce LaTourelle and Will Keenan (last seen prior in Troma's "Tromeo & Juliet" adds little to the film. It's all about Troma's independent spirit to make films Hollywood wouldn't touch with a 1,000 foot pole, and it succeeds. Far and beyond Troma's best work, it's inspired by Lloyd Kaufman's autobiography (a great read) though has little to nothing in terms of having anything to do with the book.

A few cameos also play up well, including Ron Jeremy as a pedophile father who dresses his son up like a little and a mid-credits sequence on hermaphrodite's hosted Lemmy of the band Motorhead, and featuring "South Park's" Trey Parker & Matt Stone.

From hacked off legs, to masturbating with pickles, to male full frontal nudity in two scenes it's sure to offend. Hell, Carson Daly was. As he hosted "TRL" in 1999, he made mention one day of a naked fat man running around the streets outside the studio. As it turns out, that was part of the filming of "Terror Firmer" where the character runs around naked through the streets of NYC through crowds of people who have no idea a film is even being made. Eventually his head is crushed in usual gruesome Troma fashion. Just before he runs past Troma's office building, one of many inside nods breaking the fourth dimension in film. At one point Will Keenan's character talks about his love of Spielberg films. Mainly settling down and watching something "really good" like "1941" or "Always", a joke at Spielberg's biggest financial bombs, proving even good directors have their duds. But here it's Lloyd Kaufman's time to shine when the "bad director" finally does good.