Review of Tell No One (2006) by Robinsnest — 02 Mar 2012

I just can't resist. I know my reaction to French films; but I hope I will encounter one that is good. Maybe it's because of the culture and language gap. But they just do not work. Here is another example of the critics trying to make me believe that "the emperor is wearing clothes"; but as usual he is not! This is a long ridiculous film.

There is no one to root for. Characters come in and out at breakneck speed. Just as I thought I know who someone was and what their motivation might be, how they relate to the hero, another "huh?" moment.

I hung on to see what was happening, but around half-way in, I started to use the dreaded fast forward button. I could not have cared any less about any of these people (okay, maybe the gangster who saves our hero; how did he find him? was he tracking him too?) The police and prosecutors are presented as bumbling fools, jumping to conclusions (save for one who is unbelievable at not continuing his chase of the hero).

The defense lawyer based on nothing but some, I say some, circumstantial evidence is ready to give up on her client. Ah you say characters that do not conform; that's different, worth watching. I was shown one thing, a certain way, and then a different way.

I guess no on is enlightened about the dangers of smoking; does everyone in France smoke? Even the doctors? And the grand finale, a character who conveniently sits down, makes the hero sit, and said to me, "okay, you relax too, I'll explain everything) and spells out very single detail of what went on.

The filmmakers must have known no one would be able to figure it out, let alone care.