Review of Teeth (2000) by Jake A — 18 Jul 2010

Every Rose Has Its Thorns.

A stranger to her own body, innocent Dawn discovers she has a toothed vagina when she becomes the object of violence. As she struggles to comprehend her deformity, Dawn experiences both the ups and downs of being a living example of the vagina dentata myth.

This may be the first time you've ever heard about this film. For starters the film debuted at Sundance and then received a very limited theater release. There is good reason behind this. While the plot is very original the film fails to fully deliver. Its not all bad but once you view it you can see why this film was essentially a "direct to dvd" release.

As far as I know this is Mitchell Lichtenstein's first attempt at directing and writing. And the cast is comprised of relative new comers or actors that normally get supporting cast roles. This has alot of impact on the film. The acting is bland in alot of moments and other than a few interesting scenes, the film never really picks up. The climax isn't anything to write home about either although the scene concludes rather funny.

The film isn't all bad though. The idea is very original and any of the scenes involving the girl using her new teeth were pretty funny. Jess Weixler, who plays Dawn, actually is the only standout role in the film and she does fairly well to carry this mediocre movie on her back. She does a good job of transforming from a preacher of abstinence to using her vagina as a tool to punish.

There is no real gore to the film. Guys will feel this movie though because you do see some severed penis lying around. Other than that its just some blood spray and thats it.

Another topic is the fact that this is lumped in with the horror genre. Having a girl that can bite your penis off with her vagina is really only horrifying to men. I would say this is more a black comedy exploitation film if anything.

I wish I could write more about this film but when I bought it I was pretty hyped to see it but then when it ended I was left with a puzzled reaction. The film was just kind of there. This was the pure definition of a time killer. I didn't really like or hate the movie.

So inconclusion I give the film a D. From the reviews I read about it I expected alot more. The idea and a few key scenes are the only thing that makes this movie really worth watching. I would say this is a rent movie and definitely not a buy.