Review of Survival of the Dead (2010) by Marcial R — 04 Feb 2011

So, gone are the classic works of Romero (Night, Dawn, Day), they have been replaced by over the top schlock fests like this. You know a Director has lost his talent if his new trilogy gets worse from movie to movie. Land was at least entertaining, thanks in part to the always good Dennis Hopper, Diary, while awful was at least a new take on the genre, then we have Survival. I really don't know what words I can say to fully express the utter disappointment I felt after watching this. Not a single character was believable or likable. The clichà (C)' lesbian soldier, who for some reason, likes to pleasure herself in front of her fellow troops, the completely stereotypical Latin American soldier, the kinda dumb but endearing best friend of the main good guy, the tech savvy nerd kid who is somehow a crack shot, and then the main good guy himself, if you can call him that.

Alan Van Sprang as Sarge 'Nicotine' Crocket. Sigh. I didn't know how I was supposed to feel about this character. He was a hijacking bastard in "Diary of the Dead", and in this one, he's a rootin' tootin' six shootin', yet sensitive, man of action. Van Sprang's acting was wooden, over the top and not believable at all. I mean, what? If Van Sprang is to Romero what Dicaprio is to Scorcese, then my friends, a little bit of cinema has died. Mr. Van Sprang may be a nice guy in reality, maybe he feeds starving orphans rescued puppies, I don't know, but he is in no way shape or form a leading actor, in my personal opinion that is.

Alas, Van Sprang is not the main contributor to this movies failure on a whole. If I had to peg it down, I would say the force fed religious ideals that we are forced to listen to, or the "Home Improvement", Foghorn Leghorn style of slapstick comedy. I understand wanting to show new and inventive ways of offing the undead. I get that, but when you are forced to take it to a comical, yet unfunny level, well, it seems like something a novice would do in order to make his mark. Romero is not a novice. Like it or not, he is solely responsible for zombies being what we know them as today. So I ask the question why has he resorted to rookie tactics? Senility? Boredom? Lack of interest? Either way, the man needs to stop.