Review of Superman/Batman: Apocalypse (2010) by Jovan J — 08 Jan 2011

Fuck you. This movie sucks complete dick. Anything great about the first Superman/Batman movie has been rendered shitty. Kevin Conroy and Tim Daly phone it the fuck in, and it's the first time where they sound like they're doing it for the dollas.

That's right. Kevin Conroy's performance sucks. Pull your heads out of your asses and see the light. This is what you all get for pissing and moaning that he doesn't voice Batman every. single. fucking. time.

The story? It's stupid, and it's over too quick. For some reason, Warner Bros. thinks it's a good idea to make shitty direct-to-dvd movies that are always only 75 minutes long. What's the fucking point? If these were continuations of TV shows, it'd make more sense. But there's no characterization and no actual storytelling. It's one poorly animated fight after another. And while it's pretty to look at, there's nothing fucking new here. If you want to see Batman, Superman, and Wonder Woman fighting monsters and saying shitty puns, why not watch any of the 1000 episodes of Justice League?

There is nothing worth recommending about this movie. It goes by too fast without any emotional connection to the characters. Oh, Harbinger died? Too bad I don't give a shit, because she was in two fucking scenes before dying.

Whoever wrote this movie is an idiot, and seems to think their audience is six years old, despite that the movie is PG-13. Thank you, DC. Now I know not to bother with any more of your mediocre DVD cartoons.