Review of Star Wars: The Last Jedi (2017) by Kleindropper — 25 Dec 2017

The Destruction of Star Wars and Everything Special About It:

I feel so bad for today's kids. I grew up on the original Star Wars trilogy, which clearly laid out how love, calm, and self sacrifice = the Light side of the Force, and hatred, anger, selfishness = the Dark Side. It was clear cut, and helped guide my moral compass growing up almost as much as anything. Luke emobodied these ideals and struggled with the darkness and the light through his 3 movie arc before solidifying himself as the greatest hero in the history of movie-dom by saving his father and the galaxy.

And now we have TLJ, where Disney throws everything we hold dear out the window. Luke is destroyed and treated lower than dirt. The Force and how it works is destroyed. The rebellion is destroyed. Everything the rebellion worked for in the original trilogy is destroyed. The beloved Admiral Ackbar is unceremoniously flushed in favor of a new purple haired character nobody cares about or will remember.

And the main character Rey, who I am supposed to be rooting for, is essentially a Sith in the employ of the Resistance with her rampant use of untamed dark side power. Don't worry though, the porgs and horse-dogs are saved! yay! Long live Supreme Leader Ren and the victorious First Order!

This film leaves people with ZERO anticipation for episode 9. Are 30 people (the entirety of the Resistance now fits in the Falcon) going to defeat a galactic Empire of billions? Who will lead the Resistance since we know Leia is dead IRL? Will they pull some other random pink haired lady from the back or do we need to wait 10 years for broom boy? Will Kylo finally turn good after slaughtering the entire galaxy or will Rey defeat him? Who cares. I'm out. See you later Disney. I'm going to go hug my pre-special edition VCR tapes of the original trilogy and cry.