Review of Star Wars: The Last Jedi (2017) by Anthony F — 18 Oct 2018

1 star - 1st Star Wars film I really disliked.

Good: visuals; acting; special effects; the Falcon; Jedi temple/tree/books; Yoda.

But so much bad!:

Poe's call to Hux;.

Slow motion bombing run;.

R2D2 & C3PO have nothing to do;.

Canto Bight - irrelevant to plot; Finn and Rose don't care about slave kids;.

Rose advises Finn to run away, devaluing every rebel/resistance fighters loss of life, including her sister's;.

DJ's moral relativism and nihilism wins;.

"let the past die" - motto of every violent revolutionary in history from French Terror, to Russian Marxists, to Nazis, to China's Cultural Revolution, to the Khmer Rouge;.

Rey is powerful without explanation (UNLESS she turns out to be a Skywalker in Ep9);.

Skywalker bloodline irrelevant - what the hell was the point of Eps 1-6 you idiot Rian?

Snoke dead - mystery from start to finish for moviegoers like me who have no interest in the expanded universe;.

Luke tries to kill his nephew - Luke who faced the emperor without weapons to redeem his father, now sees a dream and decides to kill his nephew in cold blood;.

Old bitter Luke - similar to young whiny Luke - are we back at Toschi station;.

BB8 - turns poker chips into missiles that defeats a legion of First Order soldiers is on par with teddy bear Ewoks defeating the Empire in ROTJ, or R2D2 having rockets to fly in Ep2 (but not in Ep4, 5 or 6 when they would have been handy);.

Maz - a stupid pointless phone call;.

Luke's lightsabre being thrown away and no explanation of why Rey got visions from it;.

Luke drinking sea cow milk - really didn't need to see that;.

Porgs - some vegetarian's propaganda about not enjoying meat?

Leia flying through space - Mary Poppins lives!

Ackbar's death - unworthy of the hero of ROTJ.

No mourning of Han - drop the Canto Bight sideline and include the deleted scene;.

Purple hair not explaining the plan - Rebels /resistance were told the plans in Ep4-7 why so why would the Resistance change tack and won't tell it's members what is going on is ludicrous.

Rey's training - 3 lessons in 1 or 2 days? not nearly enough - in TESB it is implied Luke's training is at least a few weeks, Rey's should have been at least that long;.

Timeframe - too short - all up it appears that by the time we get to the end of TLJ we're about 4 or 5 days on from when Poe was in the village on Jakku at the start of TFA;.

No lightsabre battle - Luke isn't really fighting Kylo and Luke fights Rey with a pole;.

The ending was like the ending of a trilogy, not the ending of a middle film.

In summary, what a dismal failure TLJ was. It's the 21st century equivalent of the Star Wars Holiday Special or the two TV Ewok movies. It's The Quantum of Solace of Star Wars.

Where to from here? they have to fix things in Ep9 rtega's You Tube edits :)).

1. Snoke is/was (Darth) Plageius - Ignore Pablo H's twitters.

2. Rey must be Luke and Mara Jade's daughter. born 18-20 years before TFA.

3. The evil of the First Order needs to be seen on screen.

4. There has to be a time gap of about a decade between Ep8 and 9.

5. C3PO and R2D2 need to be brought back into the middle of the story plotlines.

All opinions are my own and I make the ideas above freely available for anyone to use as they see fit.