Review of Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones (2002) by Benskylerhill — 20 May 2018

Everyone who saw The Phantom Menace had at least some problems with it, and those were voiced. So, when the time came to produce the second installment in the prequel trilogy, George Lucas listened to the audience...when it came to one thing: Jar-jar Binks has a minor role with only about three minutes of screen time in Attack of the Clones. That's it. Everything else about Episode II is about as bad as, if not worse than, it is in Episode I.

To be fair, Attack also has the same positives as Phantom: namely, the backbone of a compelling story and certain scenes of groundbreaking visual effects. The plot develops quite well in Episode II as the Jedi inadvertently set forth the chain of events that will eventually lead to their own demise. On paper, it is a tragic, sobering reflection on the transparent, elusive nature of government corruption and the dangers of blind trust. But in practice, it's a complete disaster. With the exception of portions of Ewen McGregor and Christopher Lee's performances, every actor in this film performs with the charisma of participants in a middle school play. And it doesn't help that the dialogue that they're given is often unrealistic and forced, not to mention laughably cringe-worthy. Political drama only works if dialogue flows as it would in real life and actors effectively portray human fear and weakness. There is none of that here, and the potential-filled narrative falls to pieces.

The visual effects in Attack of the Clones are quite an improvement over those in The Phantom Menace, but there's unfortunately far too heavy of a reliance upon them here, even heavier than there was in Phantom. Nearly the entirety of the last act of the movie is constructed with CGI, and it feels like a cartoon because it's used even when it's not even remotely necessary. There is not a single physically constructed droid, alien creature, or even clone trooper. They couldn't even find actors to play the clone troopers? Many of the sets aren't even real. Entire rooms are built with computers, and when it's clear that the characters aren't living in a real world, it's difficult to find a reason to care about that world.

Star Wars: Episode II is an unfortunate disaster. There are some saving qualities it possesses, like the humorous banter between R2-D2 and C3PO and the all-too-short but brilliantly conceived scene where Anakin briefly turns to darkness following a moment of personal tragedy. But what little greatness is does boast is overshadowed by poorly constructed, unconvincing sets, juvenile acting and dialogue, and boring storytelling methods that fail to bring this galaxy to life.

Story: 4.

Acting: 2.5.

Script: 2.

Visuals/Sound: 5.

Entertainment Value: 4.

OVERALL SCORE: 3.