Review of Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999) by Akashvijay — 19 Jan 2015

Star Wars I: the Phantom Menace is abysmally structured. I'm honestly having a very very hard time figuring out where all three Acts begin and end. Perhaps, it was meant to be that way. One can ask, is that ambitious or flawed? I vote for flawed. Not simply because I feel Lucas severely lacks the writing capabilities to write an abstract narrative but also because it's nothing like an abstract narrative. The problems start right from the opening shots and this is a problem in all the Star Wars movies. It starts off with backstory, with lines of narrative, scrolling up as John Williams' soundtrack plays along, serving as exposition for the upcoming events. Why couldn't they create a quick montage - a series of rapidly edited shots or just a basic sequence of still photos or simply start off before that. The entire purpose of film is to convey a story through the wonderful language of images. And when Lucas throws narrative at us, just as it appears in the script, let's just say it's a very underwhelming opening. Terrence Malick was able to briefly portray evolutionary progression and natural selection from the most elementary to the most multiplex of creatures, all in about 20 minutes in the Tree of Life. Lucas was asked to carry no such burden.Ewan McGregor is a decent actor but his role is so poorly written in the movie. For the most part, his job consists of 3 basic exercises. He walks alongside Liam Neeson stating the obvious, he looks up when he enters rooms and he keeps questioning Liam Neeson's "high intellectual Jedi converse" so that Liam Neeson can start explaining the plot. The entire Jedi counsel exists so that Lucas' characters can sit around and explain the plot to the audience. Jar Jar Binks may be the most annoying character I've ever had to witness on screen. But there are so many versions of him in this movie. It's intolerable.

Since, all of us have already seen Lucas' pantomime 1977 original, we should all agree that he's the master of oversimplification. The characters are all so black and white. There's not a single character even remotely leaning towards the second dimension. And in fact, this is a problem with all the Star Wars movies. They all show us distinctly, which characters are good and which characters are evil but none of them tell us why. In fact several movies like Apocalypse Now, Rashomon, Taxi Driver and in more recent years, Pans Labyrinth and the Dark Knight, have explored this idea of the relativity of morality so brilliantly. But of course Lucas doesn't bother with interesting objectives of that sort. The entire "dark side of the force should rule the galaxy" is as cliched as it gets. How many movies have been made where the bad guys want to take over the world? Too many to count.

But the part where I began to despise it, was the last 45 mins, which was literally jam-packed with mind-numbing CGI action. I found it amusing that Lucas thought he had the ability to juggle multiple story lines (rather I should just use action sequences instead of storyline) from the "epic" battle between the droids and Jar Jar's, to Anakin's random "attempts" to destroy the "what-ever the hell that was" all accompanied by a triumvirate lightsaber dual between Liam Neeson and Ewan McGregor with the man with the double ended light sabre. And then on top of all that, we have the dialogue. Now this is something that I am infuriated by. Lucas' writing skills are pre-school. A 10 year old could write better lines of dialogue and convey more emotion. Greeting Cards have exuded more passion than Lucas' raw use of words. It's as bad as I've ever seen (and that's not in any way an exaggerated statement).

The Phantom Menace is a disgrace to everything that contributed to the world of cinema and it opened the door for several other mindless action movies. It's over-filled with computer imagery and is completely hollow within. There's no psychology, no philosophy, basically no ideas in it whatsoever. It's the work of a machine rather than an artist and it was as entertaining as filling out your Income Tax forms. It may be appealing to adolescent boys who grew up with those characters but to me this is just a sad money making practice targeted at a series run out of control.