Review of Stan Helsing (2009) by Brian M — 04 Oct 2010

I think I have probably found the worst movie ever made.

I usually like to give every movie a chance, but this movie was by far one of the worst movies I have ever watched. I'm guessing it was supposed to be funny, but it barely got a chuckle out of me. It was also beyond stupid.

It was obviously supposed to trash the most popular horror flicks, but all it did was make them look like a whole bunch of over dressed trick or treaters. Throw in a road trip that seemed like it never ends, and, you might fall asleep. I actually wished that I was watching a horror flick, and one of the traveling foursome would die! It was that bad.

There were just way too many references towards women's breasts, lame dick jokes, and enough appearances by lame movie monsters to make you wanna barf. Throw in a trio of slutty vampires that had almost nothing to do with the movie, and you have a total crapfest.

Did the creators of this flick think the lead female charactors in the movie weren't slutty enough? And, if that wasn't bad enough, lets throw in Leslie Nielsen in Drag, and make our audience really confused. As in, Leslie Nielson is in the movie, it must be funny. Not even close!

It is almost as if the actors in the movie just wanted to get through it, and add a score to their belt. But, if you were to ask me, I would be embarressed to say I was even in this movie. Unless I was paid a butload of money just to make a cameo. Then I might mention it, but only if someone asked. Otherwise I would keep my mouth shut.

Did I mention that I didn't like it?