Review of Simon Says (2007) by Christopher B — 24 Oct 2007

This is a truly awful film. The writing, directing, editing, shot composition and acting (except by one particular fella) are terrible. But it's got 2 redeeming values, and boy are they redeeming. The kills and the awesome Crispin Glover. When someone gets Glover in a film it's like God visits them in a dream and personally blesses the film. There is no possible way that it can suck. Glover is a blast, overacting like hell and making up for the rest of the truly unwatchable characters. Honestly, the movie spends the first 40 something minutes on these teens and it takes a strong man not to run from the theater screaming like a Banshee. I'm sure if you were in the woods with these kids there, you'd decide to kill them as well. And speaking of killin', the majority of deaths in this film are pretty effin' great. Lots of gore in store for anyone who can make it past the first bit.

The movie's a complete mess, couldn't expect much else for the guy who did Harry and the Hendersons when he tries to make a horror film, but oh what a glorious mess it is.