Review of Sex Tape (2014) by Forrestgump1 — 30 Jul 2014

It had become very apparent to me early on during my viewing of “Sex Tape” that Cameron Diaz, and Jason Siegel were going to have remarkable on screen chemistry. Then the unthinkable happened, the first five minutes ended. Where to begin? is a question that is never asked in the treacherous debacle that is “Sex Tape”. A bland attempt at a lude-and raunchy R rated comedy, that is not only poorly scripted, but severely unfunny in all the wrong ways.

The film follows the early sex lives of one Jay (Siegel) and Annie (Diaz), we (the audience) know nothing about the couple at first. just that they love having sex. (As showcased within the films first hefty five minute montage - these scenes alone earned the hard R rating). Fast forward a few years -- and they have a couple kids, and are happily married. Annie is on the verge of the biggest breakthrough of her career (selling her blog to a huge branding company) headed by a douchey, crazy, and creepy Rob Lowe. While Jay is a successful songwriter, and musician. Between the jobs and the children sex is hardly ever an option. However, on a brink night to celebrate Annie’s new job. In a last ditch effort to restore some flair and originality into their sex lives...the couple inadvertently make a three hour long escapade. Thinking all was free and clear, their sex tape accidently leaks into the cloud and becomes available to all their closest friends and family. This results in a wild goose chase to “erase” all the evidence before it’s too late.

“Sex Tape” is by far one of the more intriguing premises this year has to offer. I mean ask yourself..”if you made a sex tape?” would you want your mom seeing it? heavens no. So my props go to Jake Kasdan and Jason Siegel for making a cool premise, That is, of course, the extent of my appreciation. From then on the movie wallows in self pity, and never takes off from the standard set. At one point Diaz character says “the quality of writing in porn has really gone down these days”. I immediately thought to myself “and so has this movie” ..this was a whopping twenty minutes into the film, where I knew there was no going back.

With most films that start off poorly you keep gesturing to your inner self “it’s going to get better, stick with it” and besides from a fun cameo towards the end of the fIlm (I won’t reveal who) “Sex Tape” is just moronic and plain boring. Picture an hour and forty minute long trailer..except with no humor, no jokes, and not a sensible care in the world. The film co-stars Rob Lowe in his worst performance..to date. In comparison..when you look at earlier films this year “Blended” for example, was a film that knew its boundaries, and it didn’t try to be better than it was. “Sex Tape” think’s it’s funny, and keeps mustering up the same lame one-liners that just leave you sitting in your seat checking your watch constantly wondering where the film is going. I was not a big fan of Kasdan and companies last film “Bad Teacher” I thought the bawdy humor didn’t mesh well with the plot at hand. I suppose the same goes “Sex Tape” in a sense. Not to mention this film has the most absurd amount of product placement I have ever seen. Ok..we get it..you like Apple products. Give me a break!.

“Sex Tape” is a film that comes on strong..and then surprisingly pushes you away. There are some moments where I laughed (preferably the aforementioned cameo). Sloppy characters, and even sloppier jokes (Even by R rated standards). Siegel belting out his lines in a high pitched squeal doesn’t help either. I admire the passion and devotion our two leads have to this film. (Diaz especially) However, as with most films with a intricate premise. “Sex Tape” is the latest addition to take something cool, and make it dull and lifeless.