Review of Scary Movie 5 (2013) by Joey-Clemenza — 13 Apr 2013
A quick review if you will, but what else did you expect from the fifth (and may god have mercy on our souls if this isn't the final) installement of the scary movie franchise?
In a word? No. There is nothing here worth the time writing about, if only to mention the blatant (and by all means institutionalized) formula of the film's producers... putting in the "red list" celebrities of the past couple of years and giving them "jokes" to say in front of the camera. Bad "jokes". Terrible "jokes". No, that's not true....nor is it fair. To say the cast is a common vehicle for delivering "bad jokes" would imply these jokes are of a certain merit for having been developed by a tellers unique ability to create original material. These, on the other hand are used jokes. these, on the other hand are D.O.A. type jokes you've heard before in some other form or another (which by chance were not funny then) and rehashed with a large production cost tag attached to the end of it's dead toe.
The highly totted cameos by Lindsay Lohan (who couldn't catch a break if it were gently handed to her in a Faberge egg), Charlie Sheen and Katt Williams fall dead on their face given the amount of respect their dealt with a terrible script; managed by producer types who try to keep the film length as low as possible.....so as to meet the budget quo. In the end, I find it ironic and strangely humorous about the movies existence, wherein those who brought the franchise into inception (shawn and marlon wayans) favored better (though really not by much) with "The Haunted House"; which now acts as a giant size 'suck it' gesture aimed solely at the cats who bought the rights to this aging turkey and actually thought they could turn a lucrative profit. Whose laughing hardest now? The Wayans bros? I sure as hell hope not, their no funnier than Dane Cook on a free college tour. That can't possibly be the funniest thing to come out of both of these messes of two movies, can it? Yikes!
No words. Skip it.
This review of Scary Movie 5 (2013) was written by Joey-Clemenza on 13 Apr 2013.
Scary Movie 5 has generally received negative reviews.
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