Review of Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016) by Maga_Man — 16 Dec 2016

Hugely disappointing. Disney isn't even pretending anymore that this whole project isn't just a cash grab on their part (why cast 2 famous Chinese actors and barely use them? Gotta get that foreign box office!). The story adds little if anything to the universe, frankly it clashes badly with the tone and themes of the original trilogy. The action is dull and same-y; I never really felt worried about what would happen next, even when characters were actually getting killed. Above all it's virtually impossible to invest in the characters or care what happens to them, partly because they're bland and poorly developed, and especially because we've all seen this stock lineup of Hollywood-diverse plucky underdogs a million times before (fighting white male Space Nazis of course. Whether Marvel or Star Wars or whatever, these days the enemy must always be white male Nazis) and it's beyond a cliche at this point. Note how even positive reviewers all admit that the most likeable character was the droid. Felicity Jones was especially awful, a scowling, frigid blank slate light-years away from the feisty, vivacious Princess Leia of the original movies. She gives pop culture heroines a bad name.

The bit at the end about struggling to get a signal and transmit a file was especially embarrassing. So cliched you half expect it's about to turn into a Verizon ad.

I think the NY Times said it best: "the only force here is force of habit". The whole reason Disney bought this franchise (because apparently "Star Wars" is now something you can just buy like an old couch on Craigslist) is because they know people are so addicted to the brand that they'll line up at the theater even if their new movies are mediocre. They're going to keep cranking this crap out until everyone is sick to death of Star Wars. I don't see how anyone can be OK with that and still call themselves a fan of the series.