Review of Rock of Ages (2012) by Zendoa — 14 Jun 2012

It's hard to figure out what type of film they were trying to make here, but for those looking for a quick 411 on what to expect here's the bottom line: For the 21 and under crowd who enjoy such films as High School Musical and Hannah Montana - this might be right up your alley. For the over 21 crowd- if you're looking for a musical to see with your BFF, or GBF, or both and don't mind musicals geared more towards talented singing and less about story and plot then this will also fit the bill.

However, if anyone was under the delusion that this would do for the late 80's/early 90's era, what Grease did for the 50's then to say that this was off the mark would be an understatement of legendary proportion. If anyone was hoping that the fantastic camera work, lighting, sound and locations coupled with nostalgic tunes would have the same impact as Moulin Rouge, but in a more modern period then once again- legendary understatement. Part of the problem is with what normally can be considered a Hollywood strength- continuity. The year that this story takes place may represent the beginning of the peak of Hair Band Rock N' Roll, but certainly not the transition out of it, which obviously came years later. The fact that a majority of the songs used for the film weren't even released yet in the time frame that the story is set. Also- it seemed like the story was Frankensteined together using a part of the plot from a modified Coyote Ugly- only the boy is more the focus. And although all of the people in the movie are likable, due to the films' immense ensemble cast it's not possible to relate to, or understand the nature of any character since we only spend a few minutes at a time with each. I should also point out that the story of the young female lead is unsuitable for young girls and gives a very poor impression of how to make difficult choices in life.

Most upsetting of all is that for those of us that grew up in the era when Rock N' Roll was at its' peak, the portrayal of those we used to idolize, or quasi-worship and possibly even be, is beyond stereotypical and one dimensional and ultimately highly offensive. I for one was hoping for a movie that might bring back some great memories of a time and place when being irresponsible and naive were just a part of being acceptably ignorant and free. Back then, thanks to the lack of technology, private moments and stories easily became inside jokes and were almost always attached to a favorite song that later in life provokes nostalgia.

I suppose overall I was simply confused. I didn't know what the film was trying to do, or say and it felt as if it was an entertaining movie solely for the sake of being entertaining as a musical. Kind of like a talent show routine, only longer.

Despite all of this, I do believe that all of the cast did an exceptional job and the talented singing was absolutely the highlight. On par with Duets in terms of quality. I was refreshingly surprised at how great Tom Cruise's voice was- even though I never quite understood what his character's impediment was.

Having spent several of my personal developmental years on the Sunset Strip I found most of the references and innuendo to be comforting and funny at times. I am not sure if this will be the same for anyone who hasn't grown up, or spent a substantial amount of time in L.A. As far as hilarity goes, I counted a total of 8 occasions when the audience laughed at situations in the film, but they were all very short lived. So this movie is not quite a comedy with a touch of wannabe romance that has shockingly little drama and definitely no action, but it is a musical by definition and therefore I split the difference and gave it an honest 5. If you want to see a real Rock N' Roll film with great music, a compelling story and real soul- go rent Almost Famous. I applaud the effort to bring a lighthearted movie with the intention of cheering up a somewhat depressed culture, but at the end of the day Rock of Ages simply lacks heart.