Review of Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale (2010) by Greg T — 07 Dec 2010

Never will you have seen so much old man cock in one film. Apart from that wonderous treat, a whole selection of macabre delights await in this ghoulish festive fantasy which brings the 'real' Santa Claus, a child-murdering demon, stalking into modern-day Finland after a deep-dig atop a mountain reveals his ancient burial chamber.

Of course only a savvy 8 year old understands Father Christmas's sinister scheme that will see all the local naughty children skinned and eaten and can (maybe) stop him. More akin to 'Gremlins' than a Scandanavian bloodbath, this beautifully-filmed, tongue-almost-in-cheek horror is destined to be a festive favourite for sick-minded kids forevermore.

If they can cope with all the old man cock.