Review of Prime (2005) by Kai L — 22 Sep 2009

In "Prime" Uma Thurman stars as a woman named "Rafi" (I kid you not, that is her actual name) who falls in love with a much younger guy, who also happens to be her therapist's son.

Sounds like a wonderfully weird situation for which to build a story upon, right? Maybe. Unfortunately the film doesn't cash in on any of the possibilities it's basic premise presents it with, and what we're left with is a confused, boring, badly written, totally uninteresting one-hundred and six minutes of a waste of time and film stock.

This movie has no idea what it wants to do with itself. One second it's trying to be funny, and failing, miserably. The next it's trying to be serious, and failing yet again. In fact, now that I think about it, pretty much the only thing that the movie "Prime" ever really succeeds at is failure.

Which it's doing in absolute grand fashion, but at the same time isn't exactly something worth boasting about. Meryl Streep is no good. Uma Thurman is no good. Then there's Bryan Greenberg, who no doubt thought that this movie with Uma Thurman was going to propel him into super-stardom (the poor, poor, misguided young man).

My advice is that you skip this one because, for the most part it has absolutely nothing of interest to offer. If by chance the female in your life really wants to rent it (which is exactly what happened in my case), hide in the closet until it's over.

It might be a bit tight in there, a little cramped, maybe it smells like stuffy, dirty laundry, and you might eventually pass out from heat exhaustion coupled with a severe case of claustrophobia, but all of this is still better than being forced to sit through this dreary, unfunny, jumbled mess of a movie.