Review of Piranha 3DD (2012) by Teddy S — 05 Jun 2012

Wow... THIS WAS STUPID! STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID!!!! WHY DID EVERYONE HAVE TO BE SO GOD DAMN STUPID IN THIS MOVIE!? THIS MOVIE SUCKS! This movie... good god. If there was only more of Christopher Lloyd and David Hasselhoff in this movie. Piranha 3DD is worser then any other movie this year and Im serious. This is the worst one. Im not lying anymore. There is no way Paranormal Activity 4 Or Diary Of A Wimpy Kid Dog Days can beat it in its badness. If it does... I don't know what else I can say. First, We NEED TO DOUBLE THE NUDITY! Next, LESSER THE GORE AND DOUBLE THE VIOLENCE! AND MORE DUMBASS CHARACTERS! Thats probably what director John Gulager said to his crew members of this movie. The plot is that more piranha's have been attacking the new water park The Big Wet. Hey? remember the last time when we saw a huge piranha at the end of 3D? WHERE THE HELL ARE THEY!? THESE ARE JUST FRIKN SMALL ONES! The Big Wet is stupid. There is a nude pool where ANYONE CAN EASILY PEAK AT EVERYONE. So on opening day where the deputy is afraid of water and David Hasselhoff as a lifeguard as himself there are piranhas in the pools and everyone dies. David Hasselhoff is one of the redeeming factors of this movie but there is nothing much else. All of the characters are horendous. All of the blood and gore is outrageous, all of the nudity is distracting, every single thing that has to do with boobs or violence is amazingly bad. The gore is not homemade but ShitGI crap. Visuals are crap. The movie itself is crap. It is... bad.

31/100 D.